Why can't I sprinkle ashes

[KathMc]

I have been reading this thread with intrest as we are also going for a stroll round a church very soon, to carry out my Father in law's wishes.
Some years ago we moved, and in an old coal bunker my husband found an urn still filled with someones ashes. He had died five year's before. We did not have a forwarding address nor the neighbors, so I took them to our local council and they assured me they would dispose them appropriately. Fancy putting someones ashes there and forgetting! how sad

I have a family friend whose family was not particularly close to their paternal grandmother, as she was a mean old cow. She died, was cremated, and the oldest grandchild was called and told the ashes were coming in the mail. They arrived in a box and his wife made him put them in the garage, as she really didn't want them in her house. I think they finally sprinkled them off a ship, when they were on a cruise (Sshhh  ). They had no clue what else to do with them.

[CaroleW]

My late grandparents are buried, and when my aunt (their daughter) died last year, her sister wanted her ashes to be in the same grave - not scattered

The Local authority wanted nearly £700 to open the grave - just to put an urn full of ashes in!!

As the top of the grave is soil - I think you can guess what we did?

[gbwhite]

Perhaps folk might be interested in the fee set by Parliament for interring cremated remains in churchyards: it is £110, which I always think sounds very dear, but then where else can the church get an income from to keep the churchyard looking presentable, if there are no more full interments?
Where churchyards are still 'open' the fee for a full burial (& the service leading to it) is only £220, & that can convey a grave almost in perpetuity.
Sometimes, when families don't have a lot of money I have been known to ask for a donation instead for the burial of ashes  (technically 'strewing' -opening up the soil/turf & putting the remains just below the surface). But generally your local vicar will give you better value than the Council; & there again I wouldn't totally blame anyone for doing their own thing if they were faced with unreasonable charges.

Geoffrey White
Rector of Norton, Sheffield

[Siamese Girl]

On a similar thought - can anyone tell me what I should do with my grandfather's war souvenir? He was wounded in France in 1915 and they gave him the shattered pieces of bone that they removed from his arm when they operated on his wound - and it  is still in a box in the cabinet  I don't know what I should do with it - all the family have been cremated so I can't just quietly bury it somewhere 

Carole

[valerie2]

That is tricky one Carole, maybe a little hole in your local cemetery, or perhaps one of his parent's grave's if they was not cremated. Sorry not much help   

[bearkat]

Perhaps folk might be interested in the fee set by Parliament for interring cremated remains in churchyards: it is £110, which I always think sounds very dear, but then where else can the church get an income from to keep the churchyard looking presentable, if there are no more full interments?
Where churchyards are still 'open' the fee for a full burial (& the service leading to it) is only £220, & that can convey a grave almost in perpetuity.
Sometimes, when families don't have a lot of money I have been known to ask for a donation instead for the burial of ashes  (technically 'strewing' -opening up the soil/turf & putting the remains just below the surface). But generally your local vicar will give you better value than the Council; & there again I wouldn't totally blame anyone for doing their own thing if they were faced with unreasonable charges.

Geoffrey White
Rector of Norton, Sheffield

Much of this thread had made me smile.

It was interesting to hear the views of a vicar.  I've visited several chuchyards/cemeteries this weekend.  Most were very well kept so I really appreciate the hard work that goes into maintaining them year after year.  At one churchyard the graves near the chuch were well maintained but those further away were allowed to return to nature and were under 6 feet of brambles.  I was very grateful that the grave I was looking for was close to the church.

[tinav40]

I'm glad you scattered the ashes Caz.
I work for a funeral directors, which I am fairly new to, and was quite taken aback by all the red tape and different rules on burials and cremation.
I was also very pleasantly surprised by all the ways to scatter or dispose of the ashes.
You can have jewellery and glass made. I have seen some beautiful vases made from ashes. The one I loved the most is sending your loved one to the stars. You can actually have fireworks made with the ashes. I just love the thought of my family sending me off in a rocket when my time is up.
What a way to be remembered in a firework display.

[janglaschu]

One of my friends scattered a little of her dad's ashes on his local football ground. I don't know how they got in, sweet-talked the groundsman maybe, but they said it was one of his favourite places...

[aryanmags123]

Hi

Can anyone tell me why it is illegal to scatter ashes on someones grave.
I rang the local cemetery to find the number of a grave, 91 yr old Mother in law has just passed and wanted to be scattered
on her Father's grave in the local cemetery,  I was told very bluntly it is illegal and they would do it for £150. I shall be sneaking down with ashes in a bag and doing it when no one is around.

Caz

I recently reached a service where you can scatter your loved ones in the ocean. oceans are peaceful yet full of happiness behind it. you should try to check out https://bigblueseaservices.com/get-started/, they really put up a great service when scattering your loved ones with respect.