Oh Dear, a dark secret discovered in a friend's tree

[Redroger]

In her tree, and many other's including, but not confirmed my own. The 19th century censuses seem to show that there were a lot of children apparently born to mothers in their mid to late 40s, when there was a young unmarried daughter in the household. I believe that many children of young unmarried daughters were registered and brought up as siblings to their own mother, and silence was kept.

[Nick29]

On the divorce papers they were stamped Poor Person so there must have been sort of legal aid in 1919

Margp

This makes interesting reading......

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-508936/The-wife-changed-history--asking-divorce.html

[LizzieW]

I found out, as an adult, that one of my aunts wasn't married to my uncle, but that's as far as it went, although I had overheard other aunts saying about her "Well, of course, she can't have any children".  I don't know if that meant she couldn't physically have children, or she couldn't because she wasn't married.  I know they wanted to adopt me, but naturally my mum wouldn't give up her first born and only daughter but I did stay with them often and really loved going to their house.

Years later, when my mum's mind was going a little, she suddenly came out with the whole story and told me my uncle's real surname (they had used my aunt's middle name which was her mother's maiden name as their surname) and the fact that he had left a wife and 2 sons and had lived only a few doors from them.  I've now traced his wife and sons (only on paper), as well as finding his birth and finding him on 1911 census. 

I don't suppose there was ever any option of getting a divorce in the 1930s, or perhaps the wife wouldn't divorce my uncle.

Lizzie

[Pejic]

My first mother-in-law was one of these children with an indeterminate father, brought up as her mother's sister.  She knew but was desperate (as were the whole family of her generations) to keep it secret. So imagine shock / horror when unknowing daughter married family history hobbyist! (me).  I was told so many lies I am still sorting them out, I don't know if she knew who her father was, but I kept hoping something would be left when she died, but her daughter and I were divorced by then so I don't know (but I suspect there was something),
anyway the point of this ramble is that her grand-daughter (my daughter) interested in family history (though not with my addiction) is somewhat put out that she is unlikely to ever know who one of her grandfathers is.

[7igerby7he7ail]

There are secrets in al our trees I suppose, the further we go back or expand.
Lots of cousin marriages of course, not surprising considering they never moved far in the days of yore.

I discovered that one of my ancestors married his niece.
That one of my great uncles lived with two 'wives' and fathered children with both  and didn't marry either of them.

[Pebbles Kernow]

My cousin has a similar story.

Her father was known by one name and following his disappearance (with my aunt), the police arrived at the house looking for him. When they started searching his room, 4 passports in different names were found in his room. My cousin was subsequently born and then she and my aunt eventually arrived back home. My cousin was then adopted by her stepfather. However her mother never told her what this man's name really was (if she herself ever knew).
To compound the situation she doesn't have her origianl birth certificate and cannot get it yet even though we have the GRO ref for it - she's under 50.
So that's her father's side unknown.

On her mother's side, my grandmother liked to help the troops during the war and was very very friendly with them  The result of one such friendly act was my aunt (the cousin's mother!) All we know is that he was Canadian and his name was either Michael or Lloyd. We know this as she was friendly to another Canadian which resulted in my uncle. Said uncle was named after the 2 fathers! Bless you nan 

The result of these is that my cousin knows only her mother's maternal line.

Pebs

[MargP]

My cousin has a similar story.

Her father was known by one name and following his disappearance (with my aunt), the police arrived at the house looking for him. When they started searching his room, 4 passports in different names were found in his room. My cousin was subsequently born and then she and my aunt eventually arrived back home. My cousin was then adopted by her stepfather. However her mother never told her what this man's name really was (if she herself ever knew).
To compound the situation she doesn't have her origianl birth certificate and cannot get it yet even though we have the GRO ref for it - she's under 50.
So that's her father's side unknown.

On her mother's side, my grandmother liked to help the troops during the war and was very very friendly with them  The result of one such friendly act was my aunt (the cousin's mother!) All we know is that he was Canadian and his name was either Michael or Lloyd. We know this as she was friendly to another Canadian which resulted in my uncle. Said uncle was named after the 2 fathers! Bless you nan 

The result of these is that my cousin knows only her mother's maternal line.

Pebs

I am not 100% on this but I don't see any reason why she can't get her birth certificate what ever her age

[Pebbles Kernow]

I am not 100% on this but I don't see any reason why she can't get her birth certificate what ever her age

Unfortunately you have to be able to give full details of parents to get a birth certificate of someone under 50.
Was a great laugh last year when she tried to get a passport for the first time in her life. Luckily because she was adopted we got her adoption record and she could use that instead.

We even tried ringing GRO to explain the situation and they were very nice but said she had to give full details of parents names.

We're waiting with baited breath for her 50th birthday

Pebs

[7igerby7he7ail]

My lady friend is now very happy with the research results I have given her. It is indeed fortunate that her 'uncle'/step-brother's father had an uncommon name. (There's less than 50 on recent ER's.)

Just found the 2x great grandfather born in Norwich emigrated to Australia after 1851.

When I have 'finished' this line, my friend wants me to investigate her 'other' lines.Her paternal and maternal. She has also lots of photos which have names and dates on the back, but she doesn't have a clue who most of them are. Worth investigating perhaps especially if you have written on a photo 'X and X outside their house in Bungay 1907'

Which makes me question why didn't any of my rellies have all this material when I started my tree?

I love the detective work anyhow