Author Topic: My Cousin told his friend We're Related ''Sort Of''  (Read 5503 times)

Online BumbleB

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Re: My Cousin told his friend We're Related ''Sort Of''
« Reply #18 on: Friday 09 March 18 19:06 GMT (UK) »


Yes he does want attention. He always says ''Guess what folks...... Can you believe that me and him are actually related?'' But when he says ''well sort of'' that is when I feel he is putting me down.

Give us a clue! - for heaven's sake - GROW UP - how old are you?  I'm assuming you are an adult!  :-\ :-*
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Offline Intevel

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Re: My Cousin told his friend We're Related ''Sort Of''
« Reply #19 on: Friday 09 March 18 19:08 GMT (UK) »


Yes he does want attention. He always says ''Guess what folks...... Can you believe that me and him are actually related?'' But when he says ''well sort of'' that is when I feel he is putting me down.

Give us a clue! - for heaven's sake - GROW UP - how old are you?  I'm assuming you are an adult!  :-\ :-*


What are you talking about??

Offline Rena

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Re: My Cousin told his friend We're Related ''Sort Of''
« Reply #20 on: Friday 09 March 18 19:10 GMT (UK) »


Yes he does want attention. He always says ''Guess what folks...... Can you believe that me and him are actually related?'' But when he says ''well sort of'' that is when I feel he is putting me down.

Give us a clue! - for heaven's sake - GROW UP - how old are you?  I'm assuming you are an adult!  :-\ :-*

The poster has volunteered they're both in their 30s.
Aberdeen: Findlay-Shirras,McCarthy: MidLothian: Mason,Telford,Darling,Cruikshanks,Bennett,Sime, Bell: Lanarks:Crum, Brown, MacKenzie,Cameron, Glen, Millar; Ross: Urray:Mackenzie:  Moray: Findlay; Marshall/Marischell: Perthshire: Brown Ferguson: Wales: McCarthy, Thomas: England: Almond, Askin, Dodson, Well(es). Harrison, Maw, McCarthy, Munford, Pye, Shearing, Smith, Smythe, Speight, Strike, Wallis/Wallace, Ward, Wells;Germany: Flamme,Ehlers, Bielstein, Germer, Mohlm, Reupke

Online BumbleB

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Re: My Cousin told his friend We're Related ''Sort Of''
« Reply #21 on: Friday 09 March 18 19:12 GMT (UK) »
What's that got to do with "ATTITUDES"

Transcriptions and NBI are merely finding aids.  They are NOT a substitute for original record entries.
Remember - "They'll be found when they want to be found" !!!
If you don't ask the question, you won't get an answer.
He/she who never made a mistake, never made anything.
Archbell - anywhere, any date
Kendall - WRY
Milner - WRY
Appleyard - WRY


Offline kiwihalfpint

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Re: My Cousin told his friend We're Related ''Sort Of''
« Reply #22 on: Friday 09 March 18 19:38 GMT (UK) »

Yes he does want attention. He always says ''Guess what folks...... Can you believe that me and him are actually related?'' But when he says ''well sort of'' that is when I feel he is putting me down.

I would be pleased that you are being introduced to folks, people have different ways of putting things in words, as to how we would say them, and not everyone is into Genealogy, so I wouldn't have thought it as being belittled.  I have a "well sort of cousin" on here ....  :D

Cheers
KHP
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Offline Ruskie

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Re: My Cousin told his friend We're Related ''Sort Of''
« Reply #23 on: Friday 09 March 18 20:55 GMT (UK) »
I expect that Inteval is winding us all up.  ;D

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_troll

 ;D ;D ;D

Offline kiwihalfpint

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Re: My Cousin told his friend We're Related ''Sort Of''
« Reply #24 on: Friday 09 March 18 21:52 GMT (UK) »
It did cross my mind if it was a wind up, but gave them the benefit of the doubt ;D


Cheers
KHP
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Offline Barbara.H

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Re: My Cousin told his friend We're Related ''Sort Of''
« Reply #25 on: Friday 09 March 18 22:07 GMT (UK) »
Barbara you sound nice. What is the best way I can kindly let him know my feelings?

Thank you, and sorry for not replying earlier. I have been reading the thread but on my phone, and I don't like typing a lot on my phone.

You say "...when he says 'well sort of' that is when I feel he is putting me down."
I think the key thing there is you feel he is putting you down.  You respond  that way to his words, but he doesn't necessarily mean to make you feel that way. I think you know this because you want to 'kindly' let him know your feelings and not upset him. If you really thought he was just being rude, you could just come out and say so.

Have you considered that in saying '... this is my cousin - sort of..' he's actually putting himself down, not you? Because he knows he's just about to make a mess - again! - of explaining the whole second cousin thing? So he's actually being a bit self-deprecating and is hoping you'll help him out again because he still hasn't got the hang of it.

I know you've said "he can't even explain the tree, which is annoying since I showed him the tree many times and it's actually quite simple" but as others here have pointed out, many of us have the same difficulty. After 10 years doing my family tree, I still need to look at a chart to work out the whole cousin thing. So even though it's annoying to you, if he's a good friend in other ways I think you should be kind and give him a bit more time. Next time he refers to you as 'my cousin, sort of..' just say  (with a smile) 'we're not sort-of-cousins, we're second cousins because our grandparents were siblings - I'm going to get it put on a t-shirt for him one day'

You could even literally get it put on a t-shirt and give it to him for a present!

 :) Barbara
LANCS:  Greenwood, Greenhalgh, Fishwick, Berry,
CHES/DERBYS:  Vernon
YORKS/LINCS: Watson, Stamford, Bartholomew,
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Offline Finley 1

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Re: My Cousin told his friend We're Related ''Sort Of''
« Reply #26 on: Friday 09 March 18 22:26 GMT (UK) »
What is under the next bridge I wonder ???  said Billy


xin ??? ::)