Author Topic: Re:Skeletons highlighted by DNA Results  (Read 3064 times)

Offline billbir

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Re:Skeletons highlighted by DNA Results
« on: Thursday 19 April 18 09:51 BST (UK) »
Anyone taking a DNA test must recognise that they could find some skeletons in the family tree cupboard, and I am one of those that have discovered a number. I am looking for some advice, from others in a similar position. What do you do when the exposure of these skeletons, would affect living relatives,  some old and some not so old. Do you keep it to yourself, or do you have some moral obligation to inform those concerned. I have taken the former route, but am unsure whether it is the right one. Any advice would be much appreciated.

Offline DavidG02

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Re:Skeletons highlighted by DNA Results
« Reply #1 on: Thursday 19 April 18 10:17 BST (UK) »
I think it has to be up to the individual and the circumstances around it. I'm sorry that I cant give you the advice you may want to hear but it really is your own based on family circumstances.

I havent found any major skeletons , apart from FTDNA saying I dont have any Australian Aboriginal DNA , and my mother declaring very strongly the reason my brother is dark is because of 'ancestral dalliances' which are so far not backed up by the paper trail.



Genealogy-Its a family thing

Paternal: Gibbins,McNamara, Jenkins, Schumann,  Inwood, Sheehan, Quinlan, Tierney, Cole

Maternal: Munn, Simpson , Brighton, Clayfield, Westmacott, Corbell, Hatherell, Blacksell/Blackstone, Boothey , Muirhead

Son: Bull, Kneebone, Lehmann, Cronin, Fowler, Yates, Biglands, Rix, Carpenter, Pethick, Carrick, Male, London, Jacka, Tilbrook, Scott, Hampshire, Buckley

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Offline medpat

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Re:Skeletons highlighted by DNA Results
« Reply #2 on: Thursday 19 April 18 10:38 BST (UK) »
I have inadvertently found a skeleton.

When my DNA results came through I found I had a second cousin - down as an anonymous male. I found that we should meet at my gt grandparents so sent an email stating who I was, where I was born and names that would link to any of my sets of gt grandparents.

He is a Frenchman totally bewildered that he has a British 2nd cousin. He has done his tree and there's no one British on there. He does however come from an area near WW1 battlefields and confirmed family were in the area at the time of WW1. Looks like one of my great uncles was friendly with a young French mademoiselle or madame during WW1, maybe a grandmother of his.

He wrote to say he was going to ask his older relatives if they knew why he has me as a 2nd cousin. I'm still waiting for any more info.
GEDmatch M157477

Offline billbir

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Re:Skeletons highlighted by DNA Results
« Reply #3 on: Thursday 19 April 18 13:00 BST (UK) »
I think it has to be up to the individual and the circumstances around it. I'm sorry that I cant give you the advice you may want to hear but it really is your own based on family circumstances.

I havent found any major skeletons , apart from FTDNA saying I dont have any Australian Aboriginal DNA , and my mother declaring very strongly the reason my brother is dark is because of 'ancestral dalliances' which are so far not backed up by the paper trail.
Hi David,

Thanks for your reply. It does seem as though you might have found a ‘skeleton’, and raised it with a family member, so that is interesting. I hope that you manage to resolve it.


Offline billbir

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Re:Skeletons highlighted by DNA Results
« Reply #4 on: Thursday 19 April 18 13:05 BST (UK) »
I have inadvertently found a skeleton.

When my DNA results came through I found I had a second cousin - down as an anonymous male. I found that we should meet at my gt grandparents so sent an email stating who I was, where I was born and names that would link to any of my sets of gt grandparents.

He is a Frenchman totally bewildered that he has a British 2nd cousin. He has done his tree and there's no one British on there. He does however come from an area near WW1 battlefields and confirmed family were in the area at the time of WW1. Looks like one of my great uncles was friendly with a young French mademoiselle or madame during WW1, maybe a grandmother of his.

He wrote to say he was going to ask his older relatives if they knew why he has me as a 2nd cousin. I'm still waiting for any more info.

Hi
Thanks for the interesting story. Yours, is a slightly different situation, as both you and your French relative, have taken a DNA test, and therefore, must be to some extent, prepared for the findings. Mine is where the other parties are ( I think!) blissfully unaware.That is my dilemma, do I leave them in ignorance?

Offline Billyblue

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Re:Skeletons highlighted by DNA Results
« Reply #5 on: Thursday 19 April 18 13:37 BST (UK) »
I think it has to be up to the individual and the circumstances around it. I'm sorry that I cant give you the advice you may want to hear but it really is your own based on family circumstances.

I havent found any major skeletons , apart from FTDNA saying I dont have any Australian Aboriginal DNA , and my mother declaring very strongly the reason my brother is dark is because of 'ancestral dalliances' which are so far not backed up by the paper trail.

David
Aborigines are not the only 'black' people to have been in Australia in our early days.
For instance, my Billy Blue was black, but not an aborigine, I found when I delved into things.
He came as a convict from England. We haven't traced his origins, but a cousin had his DNA done and it showed 'deep west African roots'.  And various other findings lead us to believe he or his antecedents were in Jamaica.
Have you read "Black Founders" by Cassandra Pybus?  She devotes (from memory) one chapter per person to the various black people who came with the earlier convict ships.

Dawn M
Denys (France); Rossier/Rousseau (Switzerland); Montgomery (Antrim, IRL & North Sydney NSW);  Finn (Co.Carlow, IRL & NSW); Wilson (Leicestershire & NSW); Blue (Sydney NSW); Fisher & Barrago & Harrington(all Tipperary, IRL)

Offline 3sillydogs

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Re:Skeletons highlighted by DNA Results
« Reply #6 on: Thursday 19 April 18 13:47 BST (UK) »

It can be a difficult road to travel. It will have to be your decision whether you inform the rest of the family or not.  Not all revelations of skeletons will be well received, you will have to think carefully before you decide.

My own skeleton was inadvertantly discovered when I first started researching the family, she reached out to me and we struck up a correspondence, she was looking for answers about who she was,etc, the reaction from the rest of the family was less than pleasant.
Paylet, Pallatt, Morris (Russia, UK) Burke, Hillery, Page, Rumsey, Stevens, Tyne/Thynne(UK)  Landman, van Rooyen, Tyne, Stevens, Rumsey, Visagie, Nell (South Africa)

Offline brigidmac

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Re:Skeletons highlighted by DNA Results
« Reply #7 on: Thursday 19 April 18 13:57 BST (UK) »
medpat ...my mum came out as 2nd cousin with a man on amcestry
actually it was a link thru  their grandmother .. she knew that her mother had a legitimate brother
but the man had no idea his grandmother had a baby before his father

so they are half cousins ...only one grandparent in common

this would suggest to me that it could be your grandfather who had a dalliance
if its a direct line

or an uncle (rather than great uncle ) if its a step sideways is that any help ?
Roberts,Fellman.Macdermid smith jones,Bloch,Irvine,Hallis Stevenson

Offline brigidmac

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Re:Skeletons highlighted by DNA Results
« Reply #8 on: Thursday 19 April 18 14:06 BST (UK) »
Bilbur

It is a sensitive subject
I think for people who have few direct relatives they may like to know that they do have cousins or siblings but if its a case of discoverig their beloved parents or grandparents are not their birth parents it would be more traumatic . Does it depend how distant a relative it was ?

My  mother was pleased to discover who her true grandparents were and what became of them ..and I think her new cousin was pleased to discover his grandmothers roots but was actually more interested in finding out about his fathers father .

Discretion is probably the best route ..unless you know someone is searching for answers  .
Roberts,Fellman.Macdermid smith jones,Bloch,Irvine,Hallis Stevenson