Re:Skeletons highlighted by DNA Results

[billbir]

Not a skeleton exactly, but a crumb of possible enlightenment for me. My mother's paternal line has been impossible to follow as her father was illegitimate, the result of what appears to have been a brief encounter. He was born in 1894 so I imagine there was some hushing-up done.  None now live who could shed any light on that. Mum and her brother were quite dark complexioned and dark-haired and, when I did the Ancestry DNA test a while ago, an 8% 'slice of the pie' was Iberian. None of the other lines I've followed seem to suggest that, so perhaps there's a mysterious hint of Spanish in the family. I'll never know for sure, but it's a hint I suppose.

I think that other like minded genealogists, would take your enlightened view, and take the positives out of the find. Unfortunately, those not interested in discovering their roots, take a more jaundiced view. 

[DavidG02]

Continuing, for me its relatively easy as I am comfortable with any discovery I make. I think its this curiosity that got us into FH in the first place.

I took DNA tests to help break brickwalls and to see if any of the family myths are true. ie the aboriginal descent and if my grandfather or even father are related. Neither are resolved satisfactorily but I do have a hint that the 2nd might be incorrect ie I have strong connections confirmed  with descendants of ancestors above my grandfather on his side.

Sometimes stubborness can also impact , as we see with the cousins above. I'm not sure my grandfather , if he was alive , would accept this 'evidence' . I should also accept this evidence and I do mostly, its the stickler in me, but I am still looking for the Gibbins males to test. Hop to it chaps.

I have mentioned previously my mother is reluctant to take a DNA test but she is more and more coming around to the idea. I think this stems from the idea that she might find a sister she thinks might be out there.

 As of now it is a 'story' of her father playing around and a woman being spotted in the same small area she lived in looking extraordinarily like another of her sisters , so much so people accused her sister of ignoring them. I think her reluctance may only be confirming that her father was as bad as she felt he was and the pain her mother went through.

I am removed 1-2 generations from all of this but if I did find that connection I would sit down and ask my mother as many questions as I could to see her interest. ie 'tell me the story again' ' how do you feel' etc. Then make the call from there. Though I think I would ultimately tell her if the other person wanted to meet her

[billbir]

Continuing, for me its relatively easy as I am comfortable with any discovery I make. I think its this curiosity that got us into FH in the first place.

I took DNA tests to help break brickwalls and to see if any of the family myths are true. ie the aboriginal descent and if my grandfather or even father are related. Neither are resolved satisfactorily but I do have a hint that the 2nd might be incorrect ie I have strong connections confirmed  with descendants of ancestors above my grandfather on his side.

Sometimes stubborness can also impact , as we see with the cousins above. I'm not sure my grandfather , if he was alive , would accept this 'evidence' . I should also accept this evidence and I do mostly, its the stickler in me, but I am still looking for the Gibbins males to test. Hop to it chaps.

I have mentioned previously my mother is reluctant to take a DNA test but she is more and more coming around to the idea. I think this stems from the idea that she might find a sister she thinks might be out there.

 As of now it is a 'story' of her father playing around and a woman being spotted in the same small area she lived in looking extraordinarily like another of her sisters , so much so people accused her sister of ignoring them. I think her reluctance may only be confirming that her father was as bad as she felt he was and the pain her mother went through.

I am removed 1-2 generations from all of this but if I did find that connection I would sit down and ask my mother as many questions as I could to see her interest. ie 'tell me the story again' ' how do you feel' etc. Then make the call from there. Though I think I would ultimately tell her if the other person wanted to meet her

Thanks for opening up, it is very much appreciated. It is clear from the replies that have received, that many of us have encountered the skeleton issue, and recognise that this can happen. Unfortunately, those not actively involved with genealogy, but affected by one’s research, are not so enlightened. As someone said, each case needs to been dealt with separately. I certainly managed to stimulate some interesting responses.

[3sillydogs]

""I have to say that if that happened to me, it would make me even more determined, to solve the mystery. ""

Billbir

I knew who she was soon after she contacted me, but the fact that I didn't specify to my uncle who I had found is what made me suspect that they knew and were trying to stop me from digging any further.  Despite their best efforts we have been corresponding for the past 11 years.