using dna to try and find unknown grandfather

[Hmootm]

I am very new to dna, i've only had my results for a month and am still feeling pretty overwhelmed by it all.  I was hoping that I would get some matches that would help me try and break down a few of my brick walls on my paternal side but nearly all my matches are from my mothers side 

I know the ethnicity part of the test is mostly just a bit of fun but my result said i was 17% europe south which makes a lot of sense to me, my nan always said my dads father was a greek sailor  I have a lot of matches which have greek sounding names but unfortunately, the closest matches are only 4th cousins.  A few do have trees, some of them quite large but I'm thinking it would be impossible to try and work it out , is that the case?

[Nanna52]

You could be lucky.  You could find the family line.  After that there is a lot of trial and error.  I have found the family line and was lucky that quite a few people had tested in that line.  I am narrowing it down, but I have made contact with many of the matches on that line and have been fortunate enough to get replies from a few to help my search.

[Gadget]

I'm doing a similar trawl to find a great grandfather. So far I've found a few possibles but nothing definite. As Nanna52 says, it's a lot of trial and error. Many matches have no trees and others don't reply to messages.

Have you uploaded your results to other sites?  You don't mention which site you've tested with. I tested with Ancestry but have uploaded my results to My Heritage, FTdna and gedmatch. That way you get a wider sweep.


Gadget

[Sinann]

One of my matches has found her grandfather, (unnamed on birth cert) another has found her great grandmother (child adopted)and we have narrowed the great grandfather down to one family.

You do need a few matches, people willing to engage with you and lots of cross checking of the paper trail.

[Mehrtsgirl]

I'm engaged in exactly the same activity although there are absolutely no family stories to help! On Ancestry, I narrowed down my DNA list to the region of England I was interested in, trawled through every DNA connection to find repeats of names that definitely aren't on the side of the family I know and then started a mirror tree. I do have a strong 3 - 4 th cousin match as well. Using their cM shared I then used a chart that hypothesises cMs shared to the likelihood of where the relationship is (aunts/great aunts/ etc). I'm now going through all likely contenders to either eliminate them as a potential granddad or keep them in the running. It's hard work and frustrating and I am having to make quite a few assumptions e.g. that the man was 'available' for marriage and not an office party fling! I do have a contender but unless a stronger match appears or a letter in which he professes he is the one, it's more than likely I'll never know  I'm also a member of a couple of DNA FB groups and that has been helpful as well.  Good luck with your search.

[Nanna52]

I was lucky in that I found a third/fourth cousin very early who was willing to help and told me the line I was looking for.  From there I contacted those who matched with her.  From the few replies I have narrowed it down further.
 I am on Ancestry, but added my results to Gedmatch and immediately found a strong lead who may be my half first cousin once removed and a second cousin.  Unfortunately once illegitimacy was mentioned they stopped replying.  Living in hope though.

JR is it the DNApainter chart you are using or something else?

[Mehrtsgirl]

Yes DNApainter chart and there are others out there. I get the illegitimacy bit. I've found myself considering how to approach extended family members but that word is going to have to come up and I have no idea how to manage it. I suspect I'll be shut down propmptly! Good luck 

[Nanna52]

Yes it is difficult.  I first approached as looking for an unknown father, no dates, and got a vague response and promise of checking.  I thanked them and heard no more.  When it looked like close family being involved they stopped responding completely. 

[Rosinish]

Unfortunately once illegitimacy was mentioned they stopped replying.  Living in hope though.

If that's the case Nanna, surely they will discover this at a later date if they don't believe you?

Personally, if it was myself discovering something like that, I would find it exciting, something I didn't already know, how fascinating but each to their own as they say 

Annie