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Two days after Agnes died on 24 July 1875 her death certificate shows that she was the wife of PH Aydon of Sandridge, Melbourne, not a gold miner somewhere in Victoria. So she and/or her sons knew of his whereabouts at the time of her death, although the boys, still calling themselves Roscow, were presumably not aware that he may have been their father.
From looking through various Nelson newspapers, it appears that Frederick changed his name to Aydon 3 years later in 1878, and Archibald the following year. When Archibald married in 1881 he gave his father's name as Philip Henry, and called one of his sons (I think the firstborn) Philip. So he evidently believed PH to be his father. When Frederick married in Melbourne in 1883, it was noted in local newspapers that he was the eldest son of PH Aydon of Emerald Hill - 'eldest son of' not just 'son of'. So he also seems to have believed Archibald to be PH's son, and presumably so did Philip Henry, who was obviously in contact with him.
So it seems that only Agnes knew the truth. I think comparison of DNA tests of descendants of PH's siblings with ours might give the best answer. Probably not Frederick's because his paternity could also be in doubt - Agnes gave birth to him a few months after marrying PH.

Years out of date, but I've found a death notice for Phillip/Henry in the Argus, Melbourne, on 8 May 1893, that states that Phillip Henry Aydon, aged 66, late of Victoria railways, died aboard the steamship Hohenstaufen en route to Southhampton on 12 February 1893. (Via Trove, Aus newspapers). Can't find a death certificate for him though.

Cando, I didn't explain myself very well previously. My 'version' was something I'd typed up c25 yrs ago from a photocopy of Archibald's birth cert. I've hardly looked in my genealogy boxes in the intervening years, but last night I ferreted around and found the photocopy. And yes, with the help of a magnifying glass it is Ballarat Street (looks more like Shub), Jms B Bradshaw, occupier, is the informant a month later when Archibald's birth is registered. Henry is definitely recorded as a miner (whoever provided you with info about him being described as storekeeper on it (above) gave you incorrect info.) Notwithstanding, Henry doesn't appear to have been around.

I can see there might be reasons for James not acknowledging Archibald as his son - he was married, or they were keeping up appearances (if this was an issue in Melbourne at that time). But James certainly was happy to acknowledge paternity in 1859. Based on this, for the moment at least, I will still assume the cert. to be correct and Henry was the father.

Thank you for the info regarding Philip Henry's career as a sailor; this was completely new to me and explains a lot of things (it must be him surely as everything matches up). As does the 1861 census. It's interesting that he's listed as a gentleman - did he do well from his father's will? I doubt if he made money from gold mining. He couldn't have been too well off to be back working in Oz by the 1870s. I wonder if he returned to England after he retired and that's why we can't find a death cert.
It's difficult to make sense of this couple - Agnes sounds like she was a tough cookie, but I guess she was just trying to survive the best she could.

I also have a photocopy of the marriage cert. for 1853. Somewhere above I saw Agnes' mother's name as Emily Rington. On this cert. it says Emily Ringrose.

Hi nmg1
I tried replying to your message but not sure if it was sent. I'm descended through the same line as you, but I'm not doing any family history research at present - just saw this site when trying to get Aydon info for a rellie - and decided to add in what I know. I do have recent images of Eagle Hawk Gully if you'd like to give me an email address to send them to (I received your message ok just couldn't seem to reply).
 
To descendants of Frederick - I'm not surprised at the theatre involvement - it seems to have been a family thing. Back in the 70s I met some of Philip Henry's granddaughters and they had been involved in vaudeville in Nelson when young. Frederick did work for the Victorian railways (1881-1895) after he returned to Melbourne from Nelson (1881 aboard the Te Anau), before he became involved in theatre.

I'm afraid this is the limit of my knowledge on Philip Henry, except what is listed on other sites regarding his birth, and his father and grandfather, the 2 Isaacs. I only discovered the above when spending time in Melbourne a few years ago.

Philip Henry Aydon was employed as a tally clerk in Dept 192 of the Victorian Railways from 1 July 1878 until he resigned on 30 April 1891. He had previously been employed by the Hobson Bay Railways - he appealed to the Victorian Parliament sometime during his employment there (don't have the date to hand). His son, Frederick, was also employed by Victorian Railways.
When Agnes died in Nelson her husband's address was give as Sandridge, the old name for Port Melbourne. I have never been able to find a death certificate for Philip Henry - he was my great great grandfather.