Thankyou all so much for your help, it is much appreciated, it looks to me like joseph henry senior married caroline tossell in 1832, having 3 children...caroline, eliza and joseph henry jr, by the time joseph h jr is 2 joseph henry sr has left caroline going on to later marry Martha and having children Elizabeth m, joseph a and henry g although in 1871 Martha is listed as head of family living with her 2 youngest, joseph henry sr does not die until 1877?? so did he leave Martha as well?
in 1861 joseph jr is living with joseph sr and Martha but listed on census as nephew! did joseph sr possibly tell Martha he was his nephew as he didn't want her to know he was married before!
I am still unable to find any earlier records of joseph henry senior born in Ireland around 1806 and it is the irish link I am now trying to follow, thanks again to everyone who has commented and helped me work this out, any further information will be gratefully received