Bit of advice

[Vasquez109]

My grandfather died last week and besides feeling upset, I also feel very angry.
Angry with myself because, I've always been (for a long time now) saying I'll go up and visit him tomorrow. But tomorrow never came as I was too tired coming home from work, or had things to do.

I had some photos of him as a baby with older rellies (or are they?) which now nobody knows who they are, and sadly will never find out. Right up until he died, he was in sound mind and could tell long stories about what he did years ago, info on other relatives. And he would have gladly shared all this if id taken the time to visit him.

I just don't want anyone else to make the same mistakes I have, please see your elderly relatives. Make the time! Once they're gone, a chance to find out valuable information is also gone forever.

[lmsfam]

Vasquez,

I'm sorry for your loss. 

Lisa

[Nick29]

My commiserations on your loss.  A close (more elderly) cousin died suddenly last week after a fall, and allthough we spoke regularly on the phone for hours, I still feel that we still had so much more to say.  Sadly, I don't think there is ever a time when feel that we've said all we want to say.

My thoughts are with you at this sad time.

[Vasquez109]

Thank you both for your kind words.

[mrs.tenacious]

Please accept my condolences too, Vasquez.  I, too, am forever berating myself for not asking my grandparents and great- aunts and uncles for family history.

Mrs. T.

P.S. - are your Lincolnshire Hales from Navenby?

[Viktoria]

 Sorry to hear that Vasquez, don`t be hard on yourself, it is a common occurence and we have all some experience of "if only".

 My children have no interest  in family history. They never ask questions or want to know what their grand and greatgrandparents did etc . No curiosity whatsoever in their ancestors and it grieves me because boy are there some stories to tell!
Tales of endurance and great fortitude , immense sadness borne with dignity and without counselling -- like losing three babies  and a teenager in the space of three months. What did grandma do---- adopt a family left destitute by their father and orphaned when the mum died .
Well grandma had only had 12 children of her own!!!!.
 I`m glad my mum and dad did tell us stories of when they were young especially as they were older than the average age of parents so the memories were from much earlier than would usually have been the case.
 Remember him by doing something for someone, it is very healing and a good way to mark his time on this earth. He would not want you to feel guilty . A lesser person would not care as deeply about this  as you obviously do.. Cheerio and kind regards.  Viktoria.         

[Vasquez109]

Thanks Viktoria. Comforting words 

[bykerlads]

Our children and most younger people in fact are quite naturally not always interested in family history- I think we can remember ourselves when younger and busier and understand why this is: it is the business of the young to look to the future, to work hard and think ahead.
I feel sure that my lads will eventually have the leisure to be interested in their ancestors - all the more reason, then, to create an account of our history for them. I have written the story of all the branches of the family for them, they have read it and expressed a polite interest, their attention mainly being grabbed by more dramatic episodes in wartime or when a young roust-about relative was sent to jail for breaking into a lady's house and running wildly down the lane waving stolen undergarments in the air! Clearly he'd had too much to drink. He narrowly missed being sent as a convict to Australia.
My condolences, Velasques, on your loss.

[Vasquez109]

I think youre right. I remember myself as a young lad about 20 years ago and remember being bored to tears seeing a photo album. My parents and grandparents used to chat about photos and always tried sneaking off to watch TV!

As we get older, it is natural to think about how we are in our current situation. I just wished it had started a bit earlier in my case (Im now 31!)

David.