I've messed around in this family with you (some by PM) more than most, and I know I get lost.
You said earlier:
John Short of Dronfield and formerly of Madras India married Caroline Emma Hay.
His son Lawrence was born in Dronfield in 1769.Now you have added:
I think I may have found the grandfather John Short, ordained 1725 , 30th May died Oxfordshire 1753.
If this is my man he should have had Caroline Emma Hay as a wife.Well ... not if he died in 1753 (and was likely born by not much after 1700).
Your man who had Caroline Emma Hay as a wife also had a son born in 1769 ... 16 years after this man died.
Do you mean that the one who died in 1753 could be the grandfather of the one born in 1769?
This one who died in 1753 might have had Caroline Emma Hay as a daughter-in-law (had he lived long enough to witness the marriage), but presumably not as a wife!
Maybe if you laid out a list of the known people and their dates it would help.
edit edit edit
It seems you mistook yourself when you said
John Short of Dronfield and formerly of Madras India married Caroline Emma Hay.
His son Lawrence was born in Dronfield in 1769.because you also said
John Short married Anne Slate in Dronfield 17.February 1768. His residence was listed as Dronfield, Dronfield. He was also listed as formerly of Madras.
John Short's parents were John Short and Caroline Emma Hay. So the John Short who had the son in 1769 wasn't the one who married Caroline Emma Hay, he was the son of Caroline Emma Hay.
So the question was whether the ordained John Short who died in 1753 could have been the husband of Caroline Emma Hay / father of the John Short who married Anne Slate and had a son in 1769.