My last comments on the subject.
snip
As I don't know any of the members of the weekday family who are only remotely connected to my tree I cannot have any responsibility to them. Yes I am careful that all the information recorded in my own database is correct and fully documented but I have yet to see a convincing argument that I am under any obligation to make it publicly available.
Cheers. Ed
You claim you do not have any responsibility to the weekday family but are willing to hide the truth of a historical relationship relevant to them, illogical.
snip
Would you believe I am a family historian?
Not if you are willing to conceal the truth, no!
snip
Several members of my family work on family history and we maintain our own databases, on home computers, sharing information and sometimes cross-checking sources.
Have you thought what could happen after your death, how other people could then compare the information on your private database to what you have shared with others and notice discrepancies.
Those people who previously thought your were being truthful with them then wonder why you lied to them or even why you did not trust them with the truth. You are by then dead and they cannot ask you for your reasons and are left feeling hurt that you did not feel you could trust them with the truth.
The truth may cause a short term hurt but hiding facts to prevent that short term pain may cause a lifetime of anguish, ask parents who have had a stillborn child who no one will talk about “In order to save them from pain”. Most will tell you that causes more pain than the loss of their child in the first place.
Ask adopted children who have found out after years of thinking their adoptive parents were their birth parents about the pain and mistrust that causes.
Ask the parents or spouses and children of ex-soldiers who have committed suicide because they were suffering from PTSD and nobody would talk to them about their pain, I could go on and on giving examples where hiding the truth causes more harm that being open and honest, but what is the point your mind is made up, however edmac asked for advice showing he/her has questions in his/her mind.
snip
It is entirely our prerogative what we do with the information we gather and nobody has the right to demand anything of us.
Maec
Nobody is demanding edmac does anything he/she asked for advice as to what to do “as I am approaching my use by date then I need to decide what to do.” I and others have offered such advice and backed that advice with reasons why it is in our and in the minds of professionals why it is the less hurtful course of action in the long term, rather than the easiest course of action, short term.
Cheers
Guy