Res7922,
It sounds like you are being as thorough as anyone can be. I hope you are able to solve this mystery.
Have you reached out to any cousins who might have heard stories from their parents? In my experience, sometimes cousins can know more than the people directly involved in this type of situation.
Census records are rife with inconsistencies; I wouldn't give them too much weight. They are useful as pointers but not always reliable.
Regards,
Josephine
