Legal help needed. Hospital records

[BuddysMummy]

I don't know if anyone can help me. I wonder if there is any way of seeing part of the hospital records of my mother from 1958? I think there's a 100 year limit, but might it be waived for exceptional circumstances? Are they likely to even exist?
My mother died in Redhill Hospital in Surrey on 1958. I was 2yrs old.
I was always told that I had killed her (i know, right?) and assumed it was the pregnancy which had led to her ill health and subsequent death. However I have found letters which detail that I was alone with her at home for several hours after she had collapsed. Also that I was carrying a knife when we were found.
I am now haunted by the thought of what little Annette might have done in innocence, to try to wake mum up.

Is there any hope of finding the truth? There is no one still alive who would know

[Milliepede]

Have you got her death certificate giving cause of death?  That might put your mind at rest 

I don't know who told you it was your fault but in my humble opinion that was wrong of them.

[BuddysMummy]

Her certificate gives the underlying conditions as the cause of death, but my concern is that I may have inflicted wounds on her as I tried to wake her. Not significant in causing death, but still.....

More than one member of the very dysfunctional family felt it was ok to say those things in my hearing. I know it shouldn't matter really. Even if I did wound her it wasn't intended as harm, but I'm starting to obsess about it at times.

[janan]

Her death was definitely not your fault, whatever you did or didn't do age two, as the death certificate confirms. But you went through an extremely traumatic event at a young age and that haunts you. You might consider some counselling to talk things over, if you've not already

Here is the information on the records held for that period

http://discovery.nationalarchives.gov.uk/details/r/6b446b4f-f946-49b7-8b07-a92342f86d1d

You could contact the Surrey History Centre
http://discovery.nationalarchives.gov.uk/details/a/A13531418

but even if you get permission it sounds as if the records might well be illegible

Wishing you (and  little Annette) well
Jan

[Treetotal]

As it is obviously preying on your mind and affecting your well being, your Doctor may be a good place to start. If wounding was a contributory factor, I would have thought that would have been included on the death certificate.
Carol

[Jebber]

I agree with TreeTotal, you need to speak to your own doctor explain what you were told and the affect it is having on you. You need to resolve the matter and your doctor is the best person to advise you in all aspects.

[Rhododendron]

Unexplained/suspicious deaths would probably have been subject to a Coroner's Report.  Such records are closed for a period of, I believe, 70 years.

[BuddysMummy]

Thank you.

I’m sorry, this probably sounds totally illogical. I don’t really think I killed her, nor really contributed to her death. I would just like to know if I had done anything with that knife to try to wake her.
It doesn’t prey on my mind all the time but I would like to put the sense of unease to bed.

I’m just wondering if it might be possible to see the records....

[janan]

I did get permission to view my g grandfather's mental health records before the 100 years were up but had to get written permission from the current mental health trust and show it to the Records Office. So I think it would be worth contacting the Surrey History Centre, you won't lose anything by asking them.