Help finding mother’s adoption records from 1945

[tomara1]

Mum has always said she was adopted for as long as I can remember but that’s all she ever said. I don’t know if she knew any details but she is the kind of person that tells things if she wants to and if she doesn’t offer information, you don’t question her.  Yes, my grandmother came from the UK with us and died here.

[chempat]

Could you give us your grandmother's birth and death years and names?

[tomara1]

I suppose anything might be worth a try.
Thanks

[wivenhoe]

I think it would be useful for you to just research your mother's origins, separately from the matter of adoption.

Whatever means you use to research your mother's origins, you will need some BDM documentation.

Do you have your grandmother's death certificate?

Do you have marriage certificate/s for your grandmother?

Do you have your mother's marriage certificate?

[majm]

Wise words from Wivenhoe, as usual  and, of course, the ever present aim is to establish a medical history back through several generations, back to Traci's Mum's actual birth parent/s and then earlier generations back from them.  I would not anticipate that can be achieved without a combination of a paper trail and DNA and professional counselling as there may well be siblings/half siblings still alive, cousins, who may have been born 1920s or earlier (ie same generation as the mother of the adopted lass born 1945.).   



JM

[tomara1]

Thanks. I don’t currently have my grandmothers death certificate but I imagine I could order it.
I also don’t have my grandmothers marriage certificate which would be held in the UK so not sure if that would be easy to get. 
When you say my mother’s marriage certificate, do you mean her first marriage which would be also held in the UK., or her second which would be here. 
Obviously I am ill equipped to start doing anything it seems. I had no idea I would need so much paperwork. It feels a little overwhelming to be honest.

[wivenhoe]

Can you describe the family that arrived in Australia in the 1970s..........no names, just family relationships........your grandmother........your (married?) mother.......and........

All families have stories. Some stories are received over generations. Some stories are told directly....first person.

Your story is that your mother told you she was adopted.  This might not be correct, whether your mother had genuine reason to believe it, or it suited her to say so.

People, and their lives can be complicated.  And their parents lives can be complicated...etc.....

When your mother was telling you she was adopted, was your grandmother still alive?

Where and when did your grandmother die. You might be able to find a death notice in the paper.

[tomara1]

Ok, arriving in Australia was - my grandmother, my mother, her defacto husband, myself and two younger sisters.

I think Mum was saying she was adopted when my grandmother was still alive.  It has a ring of truth about it, as my grandmother had 5 still births and was told she would never have a living child.
I have to say though that I get what you are saying. My Mum is a complicated person and has said and done things just to suit her purposes so although the adoption story seems true, it could possibly not be.  As Mum has moved into a care facility, we are currently sorting her belongings which includes my grandmothers photos. So far there are photos of Mum from about the age of 3 or 4.  There is a photo of my grandmother holding a baby but we are undecided if it is Mum or not and are studying it closely.
I have also asked Mum’s brothers two children if they recall him saying anything about Mum’s adoption. He is her brother from her adopted fathers first marriage (wife passed away at a young age), and he was 20 years older than Mum so surely would have known the story, but whether he told his kids is another thing.

[majm]

 I do so hope that you will be able to assemble quality medical history, and that along the way you will also make good friendships with people whose ancestors are also your own ancestors.  But it may be that not everyone actually 'knows' any secrets, and that's where quality organisations like jigsaw have a very special role, they have many years of quality research, and practical experiences and formal training.  It can often be that a family member does not want to be approached by another family member for medical history,  BUT that they are very pleased to be asked to help when asked by a fully trained person who is not a family member. 

JM