Author Topic: Found new living relative  (Read 2448 times)

Offline ThrelfallYorky

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Re: Found new living relative
« Reply #9 on: Sunday 01 March 20 17:49 GMT (UK) »
The first contact via the younger woman sounds the very best way to go forward.
Threlfall (Southport), Isherwood (lancs & Canada), Newbould + Topliss(Derby), Keating & Cummins (Ireland + lancs), Fisher, Strong& Casson (all Cumberland) & Downie & Bowie, Linlithgow area Scotland . Also interested in Leigh& Burrows,(Lancashire) Griffiths (Shropshire & lancs), Leaver (Lancs/Yorks) & Anderson(Cumberland and very elusive)

Offline Rena

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Re: Found new living relative
« Reply #10 on: Sunday 01 March 20 18:26 GMT (UK) »
During the course of my family history research I've used British Telecom's website to find people's phone numbers.   Depending on the relationship of the other person to myself I usually give my full name with the appendage of "Mrs", inform them I'm researching family history, and I have a family anecdote (or interesting finding) ready to utter which gives the person on the other end of the phone time to collect themselves and for them to decide whether I'm trying to scam them.

I once found myself 'phoning a lady across the border in Wales, who is not connected to my tree at all.  I'd been pestered for several days with the thought that I should contact this lady, who was a complete stranger and the only reason I knew of her was that several years earlier I'd seen her name in one of my uncles' wills dated 1998.

I used the below url, saw she was still alive, took a deep breath and dialled the number.   I told her my married name, maiden name, where I lived and gave the reason I'd phoned as outlined above; i then offered a few annecdotes to prove that I was actually related to the neighbour she used to help when he grew old. She didn't snap my head off but was just as curious as me as we ticked off a few things such as did the call coincide with an anniversary, or needing some form of helpl etc.    I believe there is an afterlife and I believe somebody up there was prodding me to make contact and thank the lady for what she'd done for him - and that's what I did.

https://www.thephonebook.bt.com/person/
Aberdeen: Findlay-Shirras,McCarthy<br />MidLothian: Mason,Telford,Darling,Cruikshanks,Bennett,Sime, Bell<br />Lanarks:Crum, Brown, MacKenzie,Cameron, Glen, Millar
Ross, Urray:Mackenzie<br />Moray: Findlay; Marshall/Marischell<br />Perthshire: Brown Ferguson<br />Wales: McCarthy, Thomas<br />England: Almond, Askin, Dodson, Harrison, Maw, McCarthy, Munford, Pye, Shearing, Smith, Smythe, Speight, Strike, Wallis/Wallace, Ward, Wells<br />Germany: Flamme,Ehlers, Bielstein, Germer, Mohlm, Reupke

Offline Rena

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Re: Found new living relative
« Reply #11 on: Sunday 01 March 20 18:28 GMT (UK) »
The first contact via the younger woman sounds the very best way to go forward.

I agree with you about this approach.
Aberdeen: Findlay-Shirras,McCarthy<br />MidLothian: Mason,Telford,Darling,Cruikshanks,Bennett,Sime, Bell<br />Lanarks:Crum, Brown, MacKenzie,Cameron, Glen, Millar
Ross, Urray:Mackenzie<br />Moray: Findlay; Marshall/Marischell<br />Perthshire: Brown Ferguson<br />Wales: McCarthy, Thomas<br />England: Almond, Askin, Dodson, Harrison, Maw, McCarthy, Munford, Pye, Shearing, Smith, Smythe, Speight, Strike, Wallis/Wallace, Ward, Wells<br />Germany: Flamme,Ehlers, Bielstein, Germer, Mohlm, Reupke


Offline louisa maud

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Re: Found new living relative
« Reply #12 on: Sunday 01 March 20 20:23 GMT (UK) »
My first contact with who I thought was a family member didn't go down very well, there were only  3 adults by the surname in England, I rang one number I got from the  directory , he wasn't happy even though I knew we were connected, I gave him all I knew, next evening I had a phone call from his brother who was very nice to me and confirmed " yes, we are indeed cousins ", an hour later his father contacted me, I arranged to meet him in London as I did his son, we walked around the areas  our grandmother was born, that was 24 years ago, I am still in contact with one son but sadly his father died, they filled in personal information about my grandmothers family, she was 1 of 12  spread over 24 years, seems half didn't know the other half existed, it was a good outcome for me and I have met the cousin several times, I have done all of the research and tell him of any interesting snippets, and oh boy are there some interesting snippets!!

Louisa Maud
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Garner, Marylebone Paddington  Northolt Ilford
Garner, Devon
Garner New Zealand
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Parkinson St Pancras,
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Jenkins Marylebone Paddington
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Sondes

Offline Biggles50

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Re: Found new living relative
« Reply #13 on: Sunday 01 March 20 20:35 GMT (UK) »
Through this forum a very kind person in Australia found my two long lost Cousins for me after I failed to identify them online or via Australia’s telephone system.

I made Fb contact with them via the Message facility, writing a break the ice message similar to what you propose.

The result is that we are now in regular contact.

Col
Lancashire:-Lamb, Gorst, Hardman, Threlfall, Lawson
Westmoreland/Cumberland:-Bush, Strickland, Chamber(s), Hedwen/Hadwin, Carleton
Monmouthshire:-Evans, Jones
Yorkshire:-Collins, Thompson, Darnborough, Drummer, Raistrick, Ewbank, Holdsworth, Clark
Herefordshire:-Ruck, Williams, Jones, Meadmore, Goode, Berrington.
Cheshire:-Ainsworth, Hayes, Norcot, Lowe, Duncalf, Lightfoot, Percival, Newton.
Ireland:-Brazell, Curwen/Curren/Curran/Corn
Canada:-Thompson, Sanderson, Hysop, Beaton, Staniforth

Offline Umm Merlin

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Re: Found new living relative
« Reply #14 on: Saturday 27 June 20 14:15 BST (UK) »
Dear all,

Following my original post, I decided a couple of weeks ago, after months of nervous hesitation, to write and contact my 'aunt's' daughter via FB.  After waiting anxiously, and then feeling that she wouldn't respond, she finally got in touch and asked me for proof.. and left me with no choice but to blurt it all out.  Cutting a long story short, she confirmed that yes, I had found the family, she was my cousin and her mother, my Mum's biological youngest sister.  I have since been in touch with another new cousin, and just a couple of days ago, Mum's sister finally got in touch and we have been communicating each day. 

I have also found out that Mum's eldest sister is still alive at 81 and a few pieces of missing information has been found and I've been able to get closure.    The sad, though not unexpected, part is that Mum was the result of a WW2 liaison and they do not know who her father was.  Her mother's husband's name is on Mum's birth certificate though he is not the father.  He was aware of his wife's dalliance and sadly, forced her to make a very tough decision.  My mother was brought up by another family.   I think my mother was aware of this and there was talk in the family of who the father was although this information is not known to my 'new family'.  Perhaps in time I'll know more surrounding the circumstances.

Meantime, my 'aunt' is happy to know I've found her and even in the first contact, wants us to meet up so I'm very grateful for the positive response.

I have mixed feelings... initially upon finding the family I was very emotional as this is something I had wanted to get closure on for my mother (who died 21 years ago) and now I'm strangely becoming like , oh well - that's that then, especially, I think, surrounding the circumstances and I'm only 'half' a biological relative.  My father, I have to say, is completely uninterested and quite offish with me about it - perhaps he's just being protective still of Mum.

So there's the update!

I'm almost 99.99% sure I would never be able to find my real grandfather and it's not something I'm going to start as there's enough factual family history to continue researching anyway.

Best wishes!
Upstone; Waterton; Roberts; Burgess; Glasspool

Offline brigidmac

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Re: Found new living relative
« Reply #15 on: Saturday 27 June 20 14:46 BST (UK) »
Well done for making contact.  Have you seen any photos of your grandmother yet ?

It's positive for other people searching that you got a good reception into your new family .
Roberts,Fellman.Macdermid MCDERMID McDiarmid Gardner Jones ,Bloch,Irvine,Hallis Stevenson ,McKay

Offline Jool

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Re: Found new living relative
« Reply #16 on: Saturday 27 June 20 15:04 BST (UK) »
Great news that you eventually plucked up the courage to make contact and got a positive response from the family.  Thanks for coming back with the update, we love to hear how things like this turn out  :)
Robbins - Wolverhampton.
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Offline Ruskie

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Re: Found new living relative
« Reply #17 on: Saturday 27 June 20 15:13 BST (UK) »
Stephanie, what a great outcome.  :)

A DNA test might be worth considering to help you find your biological grandfather.

If you took a test, your father took a test and your new found Aunt also took a test, you could compare any matches and using a process of elimination you may be able to narrow down those who come from your grandfather's side of the family.

You could just take the test yourself, and it may help, but the more people you can test, the better chance you might have.

Most of the companies have regular sales so look out for them and you could save a couple of £s.

Added: Ideally your aunt should take the test as she and your Mum have the same mother.