Dear all,
Following my original post, I decided a couple of weeks ago, after months of nervous hesitation, to write and contact my 'aunt's' daughter via FB. After waiting anxiously, and then feeling that she wouldn't respond, she finally got in touch and asked me for proof.. and left me with no choice but to blurt it all out. Cutting a long story short, she confirmed that yes, I had found the family, she was my cousin and her mother, my Mum's biological youngest sister. I have since been in touch with another new cousin, and just a couple of days ago, Mum's sister finally got in touch and we have been communicating each day.
I have also found out that Mum's eldest sister is still alive at 81 and a few pieces of missing information has been found and I've been able to get closure. The sad, though not unexpected, part is that Mum was the result of a WW2 liaison and they do not know who her father was. Her mother's husband's name is on Mum's birth certificate though he is not the father. He was aware of his wife's dalliance and sadly, forced her to make a very tough decision. My mother was brought up by another family. I think my mother was aware of this and there was talk in the family of who the father was although this information is not known to my 'new family'. Perhaps in time I'll know more surrounding the circumstances.
Meantime, my 'aunt' is happy to know I've found her and even in the first contact, wants us to meet up so I'm very grateful for the positive response.
I have mixed feelings... initially upon finding the family I was very emotional as this is something I had wanted to get closure on for my mother (who died 21 years ago) and now I'm strangely becoming like , oh well - that's that then, especially, I think, surrounding the circumstances and I'm only 'half' a biological relative. My father, I have to say, is completely uninterested and quite offish with me about it - perhaps he's just being protective still of Mum.
So there's the update!
I'm almost 99.99% sure I would never be able to find my real grandfather and it's not something I'm going to start as there's enough factual family history to continue researching anyway.
Best wishes!