Lack of progress (while staying safe)

[pharmaT]

You are putting far too much pressure on yourself.  Set yourself some easier, more achievable targets.  Nobody could clean their house every day, work full time, cope with two children along with all the other things we are all dealing with now.  Decide what really needs to be done and try your best.  If it doesn't get done today, well, there's another day tomorrow.  Keep to your priorities - your children, your work, yourself.  Nobody is asking more of you than that.

Rishile

Not 100% true, my ex reports that the house is fillthy and not good enough at housework.  He will bring up what every other 'proper person' has achieved in lockdown when back in court so cannot risk falling short

[dowdstree]

Lots of good advice pharmaT.

Since lockdown we have been given all those "must do" things on Social Media etc. What a lot of cobblers. The only difference between then and now are the restrictions put on us by the Government. Rightly so to keep everyone safe and well.

Working full time and having 2 children to bring up is not easy at the best of times and it is even more difficult now. I don't know the ages of your girls but getting kids to help in the house is easier said than done even before lockdown.

Please do not beat yourself up because your house is not in pristine condition. Who's is ? I always say it is a home not a show house.

If your ex doesn't like it then too bad. He is not living under the same pressure as you.

Take care and always remember you are a good mother and a worthwhile person.

Dorrie

[Nanna52]

PharmaT take a breath, you are letting your ex bully you.  If you keep this up you will become ill.  Then what will happen to your children.  I would rank as a poor housekeeper but no one took my son off me.  I worked full time and looked after son and aged and ailing parents.  I made sure things were clean, we had food on the table and a roof over our heads.  They were the important things.

[Maggsie]

Good God PharmaT,
You take notice of your ex?
ex = has been!
Maggsie

[Maiden Stone]

A team member on "The News Quiz"  admitted that he's more exhausted now than he was when covering Brexit and other big news stories. Reason - he's trying to combine working at home with being a teacher to his children.
My grandmother gave my mother excellent advice when she had children - look after the children first -  as long as they are healthy and there's enough food - housework and everything else can wait. That grandmother, when the mother of 2 small daughters,  survived a bout of Spanish 'flu. 

[Rishile]

My grandmother gave my mother excellent advice when she had children - look after the children first -  as long as they are healthy and there's enough food - housework and everything else can wait. That grandmother, when the mother of 2 small daughters,  survived a bout of Spanish 'flu.

I assume she also survived WW1, probably with a husband serving in the Forces with all the problems and worries that entailed as did my Great-grandmother with four small children.

Rishile

[pharmaT]

Good God PharmaT,
You take notice of your ex?
ex = has been!
Maggsie

No I take notice of the courts and SW.

[Finley 1]

Reading between the lines Pharma T  --- he is harrassing you ----    oops I wrote what I felt and had to delete it.. oh dear...

Take care please and do not give in to his   'gaslighting ways'


xin

[Maiden Stone]

My grandmother gave my mother excellent advice when she had children - look after the children first -  as long as they are healthy and there's enough food - housework and everything else can wait. That grandmother, when the mother of 2 small daughters,  survived a bout of Spanish 'flu.

I assume she also survived WW1, probably with a husband serving in the Forces with all the problems and worries that entailed as did my Great-grandmother with four small children.

Rishile

Yes. Plus unemployment & poverty in 1920s & '30's, deaths of children + years of debt due to hospital fees for a sick child.
"Crafting" for her was making rag rugs to cover bare floors, knitting needed socks and altering clothes.