Diary > Monday 17th August

[louisa maud]

I live in a semi detached house and have done for 54 years next to the same people as when we moved in,  we share a drive, no problem at all, if a car is needed to stop in the drive or people come we each ask the other to do so, we share lots of things, veg or fruit, cakes, she is a lovely cake maker but we never over step the mark, never go in unless asked, take each others washing in if raining, we have each been known to dry it and iron it, not many like that around, we would trust each other with our lives, but the people who joining on to us the other side are a different kettle of fish

Think I would have put a solid fence up for the NN not to interfere anymore but these things cost an awful lot of money to get someone in to do it, I know it cost us a fortune

Exactly Candleflame, a trouble shared etc as you say

Roobarb, hope you are feeling better today

Have a nice day folks, dull and drizzly here

Louisa Mau

[Roobarb]

Candleflame, the willow trellis is an expanding one so if you pull it out the bits between it are wider. Because it's made of willow the pieces are only narrow, not like another wooden trellis. It was just one I had to hand and I wanted to use it to train some plants across, they would be blocked from growing through to the other side by what I'd put behind it. The rest of the trellises I've used are expanding ones but just normal wood, I've taken steps to block the plants growing through. What I found so upsetting was that she could have just trimmed the plants with a pair of shears but I know she did this out of sheer spite, she's one of those people who thinks she can dictate what the whole neighbourhood does.

What a good idea to leave the old fence there when you had a new one! I'll bear it in mind for if I need a new fence. 

Thanks Louisa Maud, I'm feeling better today, it's a lovely sunny day here!

[Viktoria]

Well considering we all have annoyances, worries and grievances and have been very supportive and received support - we are a  like band of Sisters.

None of us know exactly the conditions strengths and weaknesses of the others .
That there is much to admire is very evident.
What is truly upsetting for one will be just a minor annoyance for another.
There are so many conditions etc that make how we feel and react totally different for each individual.
I probably need a kick up the pants ,missing the affectionate touching etc which was once part of my daily life.
My nasty neighbour is three doors away, so I can put him aside.
We all cope as best we can.and that means very different approaches.
I spoke to,my neighbour coolly and calmly ,mainly because I went icy cold inside and was truly frightened something physical was going to happen to me ,from myself,not the neighbour.
I am quite sure he sees that as weakness ,and will behave like thst again given half a chance.
This topic has been a safety valve for some ,we off load, a bad day ,altered bus times, nasty neighbours , people not sticking to rules which are for everyone’s benefit ,etc etc.
We have read and I have marvelled at the resilience,dedication and fortitude of the posters.
It is the feeling of being powerless ,when others affect our lives , that makes frustration assume larger proportions.
It would be lovely to have good news all the time but people have been so kind and understanding even if  our news has seemed negative.
We who live  alone have our own special difficulties ,no one to discuss things with and get a sense of proportion ,no daily small distractions etc.
My children think I am living the life of Reilly (  who is he?) because I don’t burden them, consequently they think everything is alright and they have no idea  what I really feel,they can’t - or couldn’t - visit so why worry them.
 This was a diary rather like those from the war so something to reflect our daily lives ,the plus and minus points ,perhaps to be kept for posterity.

So warts and all  we read with interest the posts .
Seeing in some great needs and problems .
Hope that by so doing we are helping ,no one is listening but we are reading .
I thank all of you,you have read my posts and commented as you saw fit and I am grateful,the next best thing in these strange times to a sympathetic ear.
Please keep contributing all  of you, you all have  interesting and salient
points to make .
 I have read all your contributions with interest, admiration , and sympathy.
Keep them coming ,everyone.
All part of life’s rich tapestry .

Viktoria.

[louisa maud]

Nice words Viktoria

LM

[Roobarb]

Yes absolutely, you have a way with words Viktoria and have summed it up completely. I've been amazed by the support I've had from Rootschatters, it's so good to have that from people who I've never even met. I know there have been a lot of reports in the news about people behaving badly during lockdown but also about people who have helped strangers in many different ways. It's good to see the better part of human nature and I think this experience has taught us all a few things.

I've posted a diary for Tuesday, I hope someone joins in. 

[candleflame]

Nice words Viktoria

LM

I agree.

[River Tyne Lass]

Hi Roobarb,

I think it is totally understandable that you need a 'sanctuary' and this is your garden.  Who doesn't need a sanctuary of sorts, especially during these times? My 'sanctuary' is my genealogy interest and books.  I think life would sometimes be tough without such pleasures.  I think you should be able to enjoy your garden in peace.  You clearly put a lot of work into this.  So I don't think you are expecting too much to want NN to keep to her side of the fence - especially after her behaviour of destroying one planting and shouting at you on another occasion.  Why should she be putting her hands over the top of your fence, anyway? It doesn't sound like she has any real excuse for it.
I am just wondering .. I recall once hearing that it is possible to get some sort of tar like paint to put on walls to deter burglars .. might this be this be a possible option for the top of your fence to deter NN  from thinking she can intrude over any time she wants?
 
Also, I really hope you will continue to feel free in how you write your entries.  It would be a shame if you felt stifled in being able to express concerns.  I think it is so good that we all have this safe place on here to express our various concerns and troubles that crop up and to feel supported.  Please continue as you have.
I also agree with others - no one needs to go away - we are all entitled to different opinions and viewpoints and that it is better to have a true 'warts and all' version of life in our entries.  To begin with I thought I would omit my concerns about lack of toilets for instance.  But then I thought, yes, I will write about it as it is a real issue for me and likely others.  So no point in trying to pretend the issue didn't exist.  So better out than in Roobarb - if you have concerns about anything don't feel that you have to have to bottle up.

[candleflame]

Lack of toilets has definitely featured in our decisions about drives out. Oh needs them to be available so our rides are short .

[River Tyne Lass]

Yes, from what I hear this has been a good deterrent in keeping people not too far from home. 
I have to travel a distance to work though using two buses - not much thought to the needs of people in my situation.  Going to the toilet is a need not a choice so I don't know what they expected some of us to do.  I do know that some desperate people have resorted to bushes.  I have had to resort to not drinking and becoming dehydrated and then suffering headaches.  I have preferred that to 'accidents' though.