Connection

[Kerrill]

Thanks for the reply Petros,
                         I still have no idea how we are connected so its got to be a secret lover somewhere, (I have found a few of them in my tree) have been in touch with the person who is also at a loss 

[brigidmac]

Have you narrowed it down to which side of both your families you match to .

First does he have any shared matches which match.your maternal side  then look for matches which descend from each grandparents

I have worked out which great grandparent is in common for an unknown match by working out which greatgrandparents dont match
Its worth looking at shared matches of shared matches of shared matches until you see a link to people whose connection you know.
For example if he has matches of matches who match your paternal ggfather that will be the  side to investigate

If you have coloir coded each of your great grandparents it will help .

Good luck

[Kerrill]

Thanks Brigid,
                      I know that the match is on my maternal side but what will I gain in knowing which side  his is on ?  I am guessing that with such a close match one of his parent's must be a unknown child of my aunties or uncles, could that be possible?

[brigidmac]

I think it would  be more distant than that or you would be full * cousins unless one of you is a different generation .

Could be that you share one grandparent .
 
One of your grandparents having a child with one of his ..

You could   see if either of your grandmothers had a birth premarriage or if any aunts uncles were adopted into the family.

Knowing which side the match is on for him will help you see where other shared matches  come from

[durhamgirl73]

You said they have an unknown person in their tree - is this a grandparent/great grandparent etc?

I know they have a tree already but why don't you start a tree as though you were them and using freebmd etc see if you find any difference.

[Kerrill]

Thanks Brigid,
                      I am thick as two short planks when it comes to DNA, I'm sure something will be found now that I know it will be one of our grandparents. Hi Durhamgirl, have just looked for the unknown person and cant find them now so he must have found them, yes I will try and build another tree thanks for that.

[durhamgirl73]

Estimated 1st-2nd cousin - you might have to go back another generation to great-grandparents.

[Kerrill]

Thanks Durhamgirl, you were spot on   

[durhamgirl73]

Have you managed to find your connection?