When is a widow/widower not a widow/widower

[Andrew Tarr]

Be Flexible in Research and never use 21st Century Accuracy Eyes

I think there may be reasons for '21st century accuracy' and reasons against.  People's existence is recorded in many more data systems today than 100 years ago, but on the other hand people then lived in more tightly-knit communities where they were known to many, if not all.  Perhaps the only chance they had of telling porkies was when giving details to registrars ?

I'm quite sure many couples married young - perhaps under pressure - and drifted apart, personally or geographically.  When one spouse left the district, the remaining one had to assume a changed identity somehow.  Divorce was out of the question for most.

[Josephine]

Yes, I've seen this many times in the lines I'm researching.

Years ago, I read something that called them "grass widows" or "grass widowers" in this context. I don't know if that was an American term.

Regards,
Josephine

[coombs]

My ancestor was never married and she said she was a widow in the 1851 and 1861 census. She had 5 baseborn children and the eldest was passed off as the last child of her parents, and her mother was 51 at the time.

[LeedsHipPriest69]

I don't think you're wrong.  Daughter Lydia married Robert McKenzie 9 Mar 1866, Blythswood, Glasgow (transcribed as TOW). 

In 1871 they are at Hampstead Road, St Pancras:
Robert MacKenzie 36 Coach Painter b Scotland
Lida MacKenzie 26 b Staffordshire

1881-1901 she is in Leeds, Yorkshire, a widow born c1846, Hanley, Staffordshire.

ADDED: Lydia was also baptised in Leeds 12 Dec 1897, with her DoB helpfully given as 25 Dec 1845, Parents Robert & Mary Tew, although it then goes a little haywire with the surname McKensie in brackets and Robert's occupation given as painter or printer.

Thanks, that's really useful, I was beginning to question myself, and it sort of makes sense her been in Leeds, as her sister Mary Ann had by this time married and was around that time living in Leeds. Not sure why she might have decided to get baptised though

[Rena]

I don't think you're wrong.  Daughter Lydia married Robert McKenzie 9 Mar 1866, Blythswood, Glasgow (transcribed as TOW). 

In 1871 they are at Hampstead Road, St Pancras:
Robert MacKenzie 36 Coach Painter b Scotland
Lida MacKenzie 26 b Staffordshire

1881-1901 she is in Leeds, Yorkshire, a widow born c1846, Hanley, Staffordshire.

ADDED: Lydia was also baptised in Leeds 12 Dec 1897, with her DoB helpfully given as 25 Dec 1845, Parents Robert & Mary Tew, although it then goes a little haywire with the surname McKensie in brackets and Robert's occupation given as painter or printer.

Thanks, that's really useful, I was beginning to question myself, and it sort of makes sense her been in Leeds, as her sister Mary Ann had by this time married and was around that time living in Leeds. Not sure why she might have decided to get baptised though

My OH had an uncle who died in his 40s due to manufacturing paint for boats.  According to a newspaper report (now lost) his face was partially eaten away.   People who spray paint are now wearing protective face coverings.

It wasn't realised that most paints contained poisonous lead.  In fact when I was younger the paint on babies cots contained lead and considering how young toddlers stood up in their cots and chewed the railing of their cots when teething it's a wonder that most survived being fatally poisoned.

It's always been my belief that a married person could apply for a judicial ruling on widowhood after the whereabouts of their legal partner was unknown for a total of seven years. 

[PrawnCocktail]

I came across several in the course of my one-place study! Some of them are here:
http://sites.rootsweb.com/~towcesterfamilies/Towcester%20Bigamists.htm

The image of the Victorians as moral and upright is slightly tarnished!

[Andrew Tarr]

It wasn't realised that most paints contained poisonous lead.  In fact when I was younger the paint on babies cots contained lead and considering how young toddlers stood up in their cots and chewed the railing of their cots when teething it's a wonder that most survived being fatally poisoned.

Just to clarify - your first statement is untrue.  What was not realised was how lead could be ingested or absorbed.  Lead had been a well-known poison for centuries, which was why smelters in the lead-mining areas in north England had enormous flues leading uphill for up to a mile, to vent the gases well away from the workers.  After some time had passed, some lucky people went up the flue to collect any lead condensate ....

And much later, petrol makers could no longer use lead tetra-ethyl as anti-knock because lead emerged in the exhaust, affecting air quality in urban areas.

[Daisypetal]

Hi,

I think this could be Robert in 1871, this time he is unmarried


1871  RG10/4712    f.68  p.12    Swinton,  Yorkshire
Village:  Kilnhurst
8 Simmins Yard

Robert TUE    Boarder Unm    49    Potter's Printer    Staffordshire  (NK)

In the household of Mary SHEPHERD.


As a boarder it would be easy to say to Mrs SHEPHERD that you are not married and she wouldn't know if it was true.


Regards,
Daisy

[Rena]

It wasn't realised that most paints contained poisonous lead.  In fact when I was younger the paint on babies cots contained lead and considering how young toddlers stood up in their cots and chewed the railing of their cots when teething it's a wonder that most survived being fatally poisoned.

Just to clarify - your first statement is untrue.  What was not realised was how lead could be ingested or absorbed.  Lead had been a well-known poison for centuries, which was why smelters in the lead-mining areas in north England had enormous flues leading uphill for up to a mile, to vent the gases well away from the workers.  After some time had passed, some lucky people went up the flue to collect any lead condensate ....

And much later, petrol makers could no longer use lead tetra-ethyl as anti-knock because lead emerged in the exhaust, affecting air quality in urban areas.

You're right about youngsters not dying - -  I've been re-shuffling my memory cells and have come to realise that they became unwell, not un-alive.