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Lovely to hear from you.  To hear from a present day descendant of someone I only know about from old records,  makes them feel so much more real. 
Not sure I have much information which is new to you about your great grandmother, Edith.  Most of what I know was provided by  “Alaskan Princess”, who kindly sent me a lot of information last year, and I assume you have seen this. 
Apart from this, the first mention of Edith I have is the following notice from the Portsmouth Evening News, 8 April, 1897:
“A marriage has been arranged, and will take place on April 21st between Mr Edward S Carruthers, R.E. Civil Staff, eldest son of Mr James Carruthers of Sevenoaks, Kent, late Superintending Civil Engineer, Pembroke Dock, and Edith Maud Stokes, eldest daughter of Mr W L Stokes, J.P., Limerick, and granddaughter of the late Mr Edward Stokes of Dundrum Co. Dublin.”
Unfortunately it omits to mention where the marriage will take place! 
I have the birth certificate for their daughter Eleanor Jane Stigant born on 8 February, 1898, in Limerick, and also the marriage certificate for Paul Whetham and Edith in Buenos Aires on 25 July, 1911.  This gives Edith’s father’s name as William Lamb Stokes (deceased), and occupation Merchant. 
I Googled the names of Edith’s father and grandfather, and their names came up, so you should not find it too difficult to find out more about them as they seem to be quite a prominent Irish family.
I found Eleanor (known as Nellie) in the 1911 census at a boarding school in Southport, Lancashire.  After the divorce Edith went to Argentina then later on to Africa, so it doesn’t look as if she could have spent much time with her daughter.  Eleanor married Harry Bligh an RAF pilot from Sevenoaks, Kent, in London in 1922, so maybe she spent more time with her Carruthers grandfather and his family as they lived in Sevenoaks.  Do you know if your grandfather was able to meet his half sister at all or have much contact with her? 
I feel rather sorry for Eleanor as her father died in 1917 when she would have been only 19.  Edward had remarried but I don’t know how she got on with her stepmother. 
With this very international background I am quite curious to know where you family are living now!   I assume you are no longer in Africa.
One other small piece of information I have is from a probate list dated 12 June, 1895:
Stokes, Edward.  Effects £327.  Probate of the Will of Edward Stokes late of 7 Sydenham Road, Dundrum, County Dublin, Esquire, who died 17 May 1895 at same placed granted at Dublin to Frederick Stokes of 7 Sydenham Road, Esquire.
I hope amongst the above there may be something to help with your research, and I would appreciate any comments you may have.
Best wishes for a Happy New Year and lots of progress with your family history project.
Valerie

Colleen,
A great Christmas gift indeed!  I had almost given up on finding the ending to the Carruthers/Whetham story.  Apologies for the delay in responding, but the Christmas period has been particularly hectic this year.
You have so much information I’m not sure I can add much to it, but I have read the newspaper articles regarding the divorce.  Edward and Edith Carruthers had a daughter Eleanor Jane (Nellie) born in Limerick in 1898.  Edward and Paul Whetham met and became close friends when they were both posted to Kent.  Edward was subsequently posted to Hong Kong and Edith could not, or would not, (don’t know which) accompany him, so Edward asked his good friend Paul to take care of Edith while he was away.  (A bit naïve of him!)  Paul obviously carried out his duties too seriously, and when Edward returned from Hong Kong, Edith refused to join him, so he instigated divorce proceedings on the grounds of Paul’s misconduct with Edith.  It was accepted that Edward was the innocent party and he was awarded custody of their daughter, and also damages of £1,500 – a pretty large sum at that time as I believe Edward’s salary was around £400 a year. 
Edith and Paul travelled to Buenos Aires on the “Asturias” in April 1910, listed as Mr & Mrs Whetham, and Edward Carruthers married Alice Molony in London in September 1911. 
Sadly Edward died in 1917 in his 52nd year.  He was in Sevenoaks, Kent, for his father James’ funeral, and after the funeral had a cerebral haemorrhage and died three hours later.  He had been in poor health for several years with kidney problems.  In his will he asked Alice to take care of his daughter, Eleanor.   I have seen a file of correspondence at the National Archives between 1917 and 1924 concerning his wife Alice’s petitions for a widow’s pension, which she was not automatically entitled to apparently as Edward was an honorary Captain, and later Major, in the Royal Engineers and not strictly speaking military personnel.  Not sure if she ever succeeded as I have not found any further trace of her after 1924, but she did succeed in getting a War Grave for him in Sevenoaks due to his contribution to WW1 despite not being fit enough to go to the front line in France.
Eleanor was at a boarding school according to the 1911 census, and I am not sure how much Alice contributed to her welfare.  She didn’t mention a dependant step-daughter in her correspondence with the War Office.  Eleanor married Flight Lieut. Harry Bligh in 1922.  He was from an old Sevenoaks family, which suggests that she must have spent time in Sevenoaks so maybe her Carruthers family took main responsibility for her welfare as I can’t imagine she could have had a very close relationship with her mother in Argentina. 
Have just checked my Whetham notes and can’t find Thomas and Robert Whetham whom you are descended from.  I only  have the family of Stephan and Jane/Jenny Tucker, and also Stephan William & Maria Louisa Button Evans children.  I suppose Thomas and Robert are a later generation I do not have information about. 

Best wishes and Happy New Year,
Valerie

Not sure if anyone is still following these e-mails as nothing has been added for several years.  I came across the Whethams through my Carruthers family.  Captain Edward S Carruthers married Edith Maud Stokes in 1897, but the marriage was not a success and they divorced in 1910.  Edith subsequently married Captain Paul Whetham in Buenos Aires the following year.  Paul was born in 1877 the son of Stephen Whetham and his wife Maria.  Stephen I gather ran the family business in Bridport, while his brother Charles managed the London office.  After their marriage in 1911, all I know is that Paul rejoined the army as a volunteer from Argentina when World War I broke out.  By the end of the war he was a Lieut-Colonel, and was awarded the D.S.O.  I have not found any trace of them returning to England, so would love to hear from anyone who knows anything about what happened to them after this.  I hope there was a happy ending to this story, and they both lived happily ever after!