WHETHAM family

[WmCjCw42]

Colleen,
A great Christmas gift indeed!  I had almost given up on finding the ending to the Carruthers/Whetham story.  Apologies for the delay in responding, but the Christmas period has been particularly hectic this year.
You have so much information I’m not sure I can add much to it, but I have read the newspaper articles regarding the divorce.  Edward and Edith Carruthers had a daughter Eleanor Jane (Nellie) born in Limerick in 1898.  Edward and Paul Whetham met and became close friends when they were both posted to Kent.  Edward was subsequently posted to Hong Kong and Edith could not, or would not, (don’t know which) accompany him, so Edward asked his good friend Paul to take care of Edith while he was away.  (A bit naïve of him!)  Paul obviously carried out his duties too seriously, and when Edward returned from Hong Kong, Edith refused to join him, so he instigated divorce proceedings on the grounds of Paul’s misconduct with Edith.  It was accepted that Edward was the innocent party and he was awarded custody of their daughter, and also damages of £1,500 – a pretty large sum at that time as I believe Edward’s salary was around £400 a year. 
Edith and Paul travelled to Buenos Aires on the “Asturias” in April 1910, listed as Mr & Mrs Whetham, and Edward Carruthers married Alice Molony in London in September 1911. 
Sadly Edward died in 1917 in his 52nd year.  He was in Sevenoaks, Kent, for his father James’ funeral, and after the funeral had a cerebral haemorrhage and died three hours later.  He had been in poor health for several years with kidney problems.  In his will he asked Alice to take care of his daughter, Eleanor.   I have seen a file of correspondence at the National Archives between 1917 and 1924 concerning his wife Alice’s petitions for a widow’s pension, which she was not automatically entitled to apparently as Edward was an honorary Captain, and later Major, in the Royal Engineers and not strictly speaking military personnel.  Not sure if she ever succeeded as I have not found any further trace of her after 1924, but she did succeed in getting a War Grave for him in Sevenoaks due to his contribution to WW1 despite not being fit enough to go to the front line in France.
Eleanor was at a boarding school according to the 1911 census, and I am not sure how much Alice contributed to her welfare.  She didn’t mention a dependant step-daughter in her correspondence with the War Office.  Eleanor married Flight Lieut. Harry Bligh in 1922.  He was from an old Sevenoaks family, which suggests that she must have spent time in Sevenoaks so maybe her Carruthers family took main responsibility for her welfare as I can’t imagine she could have had a very close relationship with her mother in Argentina. 
Have just checked my Whetham notes and can’t find Thomas and Robert Whetham whom you are descended from.  I only  have the family of Stephan and Jane/Jenny Tucker, and also Stephan William & Maria Louisa Button Evans children.  I suppose Thomas and Robert are a later generation I do not have information about. 

Best wishes and Happy New Year,
Valerie

[AlaskanPrincess]

  Valerie, Happy New Year!  Thanks so much for your reply and the info you've shared!  Perhaps we should be chatting via email!    I'm still discovering glitches in upgrade of the genealogy program I use (Legacy).  My latest discovery is that it's not saving all the data I enter -- well, actually, it seems to have been saving them, as separate family files.  The info I shared with you re: Paul and Edith wasn't in my 'current' file but in file I saved several sessions ago (last month.)  I'm failing miserable at trying to explain this .... because I can't, at this point, explain the link in my line and Stephen's line.  It DOES exist and I have found/proven it.  But whether I'll be able to find that again??  (sigh)  I do have direct line tracked back to old John - born cir 1460. 15 generations!
As far as Stephen - married Frances M. [LNU]
son: Stephen, Esq, J.P. (1780-1860) married Jane, or Jenny TUCKER (d/o John TUCKER and Jenny or Jane HOUNSELL). 12 children identified: Lord Mayor, Sir Charles; Ellen; Henry; Isaac Tucker; George Stephen; John; Mary; Elizabeth; Emily; Frances; Stephen William; and Jane. [I've found spouses for 7 of the children...]

[WmCjCw42]

Thank you for your reply.  Sorry for the delay in getting back to you.
Yes, I agree e-mail would be better, but they advise against doing that, so unless you know of a way to exchange addresses, we'd better continue as we are.
Best wishes,
Valerie

[jsorin]

Hi Trevor,

My name is Jennifer Sorin and I am a producer on the PBS Television series Finding Your Roots. I am really interested in learning more about your connection to Charles Whetham, especially the photos that you have.

Please email me at j.sorin@ark-media.net as soon as you see this message.

Thank you so much.

[Kmc123]

Hi, I am not sure if you are still interested in finding out more about Edith Maud Whetham and Captain Paul Whetham, who went to live in Argentina. I have only just found your posts from last year. They had a son, Stephen Dennis, who was my grandfather. I would be interested to find out more of what more you have discovered of the family history, as we have recently been finding out more about Edith Maud (previously Carruthers, nee Stokes), our great grandmother.

[WmCjCw42]

Lovely to hear from you.  To hear from a present day descendant of someone I only know about from old records,  makes them feel so much more real. 
Not sure I have much information which is new to you about your great grandmother, Edith.  Most of what I know was provided by  “Alaskan Princess”, who kindly sent me a lot of information last year, and I assume you have seen this. 
Apart from this, the first mention of Edith I have is the following notice from the Portsmouth Evening News, 8 April, 1897:
“A marriage has been arranged, and will take place on April 21st between Mr Edward S Carruthers, R.E. Civil Staff, eldest son of Mr James Carruthers of Sevenoaks, Kent, late Superintending Civil Engineer, Pembroke Dock, and Edith Maud Stokes, eldest daughter of Mr W L Stokes, J.P., Limerick, and granddaughter of the late Mr Edward Stokes of Dundrum Co. Dublin.”
Unfortunately it omits to mention where the marriage will take place! 
I have the birth certificate for their daughter Eleanor Jane Stigant born on 8 February, 1898, in Limerick, and also the marriage certificate for Paul Whetham and Edith in Buenos Aires on 25 July, 1911.  This gives Edith’s father’s name as William Lamb Stokes (deceased), and occupation Merchant. 
I Googled the names of Edith’s father and grandfather, and their names came up, so you should not find it too difficult to find out more about them as they seem to be quite a prominent Irish family.
I found Eleanor (known as Nellie) in the 1911 census at a boarding school in Southport, Lancashire.  After the divorce Edith went to Argentina then later on to Africa, so it doesn’t look as if she could have spent much time with her daughter.  Eleanor married Harry Bligh an RAF pilot from Sevenoaks, Kent, in London in 1922, so maybe she spent more time with her Carruthers grandfather and his family as they lived in Sevenoaks.  Do you know if your grandfather was able to meet his half sister at all or have much contact with her? 
I feel rather sorry for Eleanor as her father died in 1917 when she would have been only 19.  Edward had remarried but I don’t know how she got on with her stepmother. 
With this very international background I am quite curious to know where you family are living now!   I assume you are no longer in Africa.
One other small piece of information I have is from a probate list dated 12 June, 1895:
Stokes, Edward.  Effects £327.  Probate of the Will of Edward Stokes late of 7 Sydenham Road, Dundrum, County Dublin, Esquire, who died 17 May 1895 at same placed granted at Dublin to Frederick Stokes of 7 Sydenham Road, Esquire.
I hope amongst the above there may be something to help with your research, and I would appreciate any comments you may have.
Best wishes for a Happy New Year and lots of progress with your family history project.
Valerie

[Kmc123]

Hi,
Thank you so much for responding.

We are now based in the UK. My grandparents (Stephen Dennis Whetham and Dorothy Elizabeth (nee Burrell) did live in Kenya, and my father and aunt grew up there. My dad came to live here after being educated in the UK and my aunt now lives in NZ. My grandparents came to live in the UK in the late 70s. I was aware that he had a half sister, but I will find out more about whether they had much contact. I never knew her, or much of her.

May I ask where you fit into the family and where you are based? I have a copy of a very detailed family history of a branch of the Whetham family, the Boddam - Whethams, written by David B-W in 1987. It it has wonderfully detailed family trees for the various branches of the family, and I may be able to help with some links that you have queries about. Obviously it is not my work however so I can't publish any of it!

Kind regards,
Kate

[Kmc123]

I'm failing miserable at trying to explain this .... because I can't, at this point, explain the link in my line and Stephen's line.  It DOES exist and I have found/proven it.  But whether I'll be able to find that again??  (sigh)

I kniw that this message was from a while ago, but incase you never recovered your lost files, I have a tree that shows this link!
There are several generations between the names you both mentioned. If you are interested, please let me know and I can see if I can post it somehow!
Kind regards, Kate

[WmCjCw42]

Kate,
Sorry for the delay in getting back to you.  Christmas and New Year was quite busy, but things are settling down to normal again now.
My connection is through the Carruthers family.  Edward Carruthers, Edith Stokes' first husband, was my grandmother's cousin, so quite a tenuous link really.  I started looking into engineers in the Carruthers family as some of them have had very successful careers in engineering, among them Edward's brother David who was a Chief Engineer in the Royal Navy and was awarded a CBE at the end of WW1, and my brother who has recently retired after a very successful career in the oil industry.  It was while doing this that I came across the Edward and Edith's divorce case, and got sidetracked as I was curious to know what happened to them and whether the story had a happy ending.  Edward also quickly remarried, but sadly it was a short one as he died in 1917.  He suffered a cerebral haemorrhage on the day of his father's funeral and died a few hours later. 
Have you seen a newspaper account of the divorce?  I can send you a transcript if you haven't.
I live in England in Essex, and have most of my family quite nearby.  Years ago I travelled quite a bit and lived abroad for a number of years, but now have returned to my roots in the town where I spent my childhood.
Wishing you a very Happy New Year, and lots of success with your family history.
Valerie