Author Topic: Am I just too touchy?  (Read 8773 times)

Offline Annette7

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Am I just too touchy?
« on: Friday 19 October 07 21:09 BST (UK) »
Last night I spent at least an hour searching the Scottish census for someone (whom I won't name) who'd posted a message.   I was successful - noted the entries and then posted a reply.

Today I see a response - just one word 'Cheers'.   Having used up my time, using resources that I subscribe too for a 'Cheers' makes me so mad.   One things for sure - I won't help that person again.

I often help people if I can and have always received a suitable thank you which makes it worthwhile.    But a 'cheers'!   Am I just being oversensitive?

Annette       
Scopes (One-Name Study - Worldwide)
Suffolk - Grist, Knights, Bullenthorpe, Watcham
Scotland - Spence, Horne, Cowan, Moffat
London -  Monk

Don't walk behind me, I may not lead.   Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow.   Just walk beside me and be my friend.

Census Information is Crown Copyright, from www.nationalarchives.gov.uk

Offline Nutty1966

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Re: Am I just too touchy?
« Reply #1 on: Friday 19 October 07 21:15 BST (UK) »
No I don't think so, and on the whole I find most people are pleased when you do help but not all, don;t want them on their knees, but just a positive thank you

if someone had posted positive info for me I would be over the moon,  :D

Well done you  ;D


Jane
LEICESTERSHIRE & MIDDLESBROUGH - BOLLANDS, GORE,
LINCOLNSHIRE - BAKEWELL, MARRIOTT
MONAGHAN & CRAMLINGTON - RICE
LAZENBY - HANSOM, HARRISON, NODDINGS, EASBY
BARNBY DUN - HARVEY, BLANCHARD
DANBY & WHITBY  - JEFFELS
LIVERPOOL - GANDER
SKELTON & ESTON - SEATON
BEDALE & MIDDLESBROUGH - STEPHENSON
BROUGHTON - HARRISON
MIDDLESBROUGH - WARD,FOSTER
PINCHINTHORPE -  POSTGATE
BILSDALE- BOYES


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Offline trystan

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Re: Am I just too touchy?
« Reply #2 on: Friday 19 October 07 21:17 BST (UK) »
Yikes - I better be careful what I write here. (Only joking).

It's often difficult to tell the tone of somebody's reply in a message and sometimes it can be easy to take offense at something. Some people have great difficulty using computers, or typing, and some have physical handicaps preventing them from writing much at all.

Some people do not reply at all, or do not even think of replying. I help people on RootsChat as an administrator and a lot of the time I don't even get a "cheers" after unraveling problems. It doesn't stop me from helping them again as I tell myself that perhaps this next time they'll thank me, or say "Cheers".

Trystan
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Offline Maggott

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Re: Am I just too touchy?
« Reply #3 on: Friday 19 October 07 22:00 BST (UK) »
People are casual these days - especially when they'e emailing.  I've noticed for some time that a spoken 'Cheers' is used instead of 'Thanks' & I reckon this has seeped through to computer usage. I don't think for a moment that the person you were helping meant to be rude - if they'd been speaking to you I bet you would have had a big grin as well as the 'Cheers'.  At least you had an acknowledgement -these days (says the Old Party) that in itself is a mark of gratitude.  I don't like it either, but I reckon we're stuck with it!
Maggott


Offline kerryb

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Re: Am I just too touchy?
« Reply #4 on: Friday 19 October 07 22:06 BST (UK) »
Annette

As we become more and more communicators by email and text messaging unfortunately lengthy prose disappears.  Something I hate very much but unfortunately I think we have to live with it.  I try to use smileys to emphasize a feeling such as Thankyou  :), somehow it makes me feel I'm adding more to my point.

This is a problem my boss and I have recently had to deal with.  I kept getting what I thought were terse, almost to the point of rude emails from her.  She was just thinking on the hoof of jobs she wanted me to do and whizzing her thoughts off to me.  I have learnt not to take it too personally!!

Kerry
Census information Crown Copyright, from www.nationalarchives.gov.uk

Searching for my family - Baldwin - Sussex, Middlesex, Cork, Pilbeam - Sussex, Harmer - Sussex, Terry - Surrey, Kent, Rhoades - Lincs, Roffey - Surrey, Traies - Devon & Middlesex & many many more to be found on my website ....

Offline Annette7

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Re: Am I just too touchy?
« Reply #5 on: Friday 19 October 07 22:11 BST (UK) »
Thank you all for your comments.

I guess I need a thicker skin after all.   

Annette
Scopes (One-Name Study - Worldwide)
Suffolk - Grist, Knights, Bullenthorpe, Watcham
Scotland - Spence, Horne, Cowan, Moffat
London -  Monk

Don't walk behind me, I may not lead.   Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow.   Just walk beside me and be my friend.

Census Information is Crown Copyright, from www.nationalarchives.gov.uk

Offline Gadget

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Re: Am I just too touchy?
« Reply #6 on: Friday 19 October 07 22:25 BST (UK) »
Hi Annette

It's happened to me quite a lot with not even a thank you or Cheers, as Trystan says.

I, like you,  do feel miffed (especially when I've used SP units) and vow not to help that person again but I soon forget who I've vowed not to help so I just help anyway  :D

You did get a kiss  :)

Gadget

Added - modified because what I said seemed to mean something else. It's the  lack of thanks (or cheers) that I was referring to  ::)
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Offline Lynn H

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Re: Am I just too touchy?
« Reply #7 on: Friday 19 October 07 22:45 BST (UK) »
Hi Annette. Just today for the very first time i thanked Toni with a "cheers"   It was not  meant to offend  and hope it wasn't taken that way. But as i have said before that i speak as i hear and find
                                     Lynn H.

P.S. Appologies to all who i offended.
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Offline g a r

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Re: Am I just too touchy?
« Reply #8 on: Friday 19 October 07 23:41 BST (UK) »
Hi Annette,

As well as the "cheers", you got the satisfaction of a successful search. That is something that
Quote
someone (whom I won't name)
will not get.

To me that is "time well spent".

take care
g a r