Sharing the less-than-glorious facts about ancestors

[Josephine]

I've accepted that I come from a long line of 'black sheep' and therefore don't mind discovering that 2nd, 3rd or 4th great-grandparents did prison time; on the contrary, I am fascinated and want to learn everything I can about the circumstances of their lives and crimes, etc.

Members of my close family tend to react the same way when I share the info with them. It was 100 or more years ago and we don't feel that it reflects badly on us as individuals to have ancestors who were a far cry from criminal masterminds.

Not everyone feels that way, however, and I'm wondering how Rootschatters (or your relatives) have reacted to such news. Even if it was a century or more ago, are there some things you would rather not know about your ancestors?

Best regards,
Josephine

[coombs]

I uncovered a skeleton a few years ago and when I shared the info it has been met with disdain. I even said so to an archivist and was told that he would rather not know that by a relative who was with me. She said "Yes OK I dont think he wants to hear that". Some skeletons still can carry a big stigma.

I get a bit tired of this "their point of view" as how were they to know 100 years down the line there would be better benefits, computers and home gadgets. I think our ancestors had hard lives but got on with it. Back then many people were nasty like there are today. You will come across an ancestor or sibling who did not appear to be a very nice person.

[Josephine]

Thanks, Coombs. It's too bad your discovery was met with disdain. Did that turn you off trying to share it with others who might be interested?

Best regards,
Josephine

[StanleysChesterton]

I LOVE it!  None of my ancestors were business people, or shop owners; none were wealthy, literary, artistic, clever, or entertainers.

Mine just plodded on: a birth, maybe a marriage, a death.

Their antics, reported in the newspapers, make them come alive!  So far I've found family abandonment at the workhouse (twice) with two prison sentences; bigamy; hidden gold; petty thieving of fowls, scrumping for apples, and schoolboy robbing of fruit from fields and shops; bastardy payments/court; a reported two-man rape; accused of buying stolen goods; accused of poaching; riding bicycles without lights and stealing bicycles from neighbours' sheds.

I just wish there were more details!

I find the newspapers more interesting than BMDs because so many of the tree simply disappear, or appear from nowhere .... it's what keeps me going - the chance of finding some salacious gossip!

[MadaboutRoses1883]

I LOVE it!  None of my ancestors were business people, or shop owners; none were wealthy, literary, artistic, clever, or entertainers.

Mine just plodded on: a birth, maybe a marriage, a death.

Their antics, reported in the newspapers, make them come alive!  So far I've found family abandonment at the workhouse (twice) with two prison sentences; bigamy; hidden gold; petty thieving of fowls, scrumping for apples, and schoolboy robbing of fruit from fields and shops; bastardy payments/court; a reported two-man rape; accused of buying stolen goods; accused of poaching; riding bicycles without lights and stealing bicycles from neighbours' sheds.

I just wish there were more details!

I find the newspapers more interesting than BMDs because so many of the tree simply disappear, or appear from nowhere .... it's what keeps me going - the chance of finding some salacious gossip!

I so agree with you, newspaper articles really do make your ancestors come alive.

[Josephine]

That's fantastic, StanleysChesterton!

I'm with you, MadaboutRoses1883!

 

[Jomot]

Personally I want to know everything I can (I wouldn't do this every spare hour if I didn't  ) but find that other family members - especially older ones - don't want to hear anything different to the stories they've been handed down.   

I initially found it frustrating that my mother had no problem with always knowing her maternal grandfather was a bigamist, but flatly refused to accept it when I found that her paternal great grandfather was one too.  She would happily talk about her maternal grandmother living 'over the brush' as a result, but wouldn't accept that her paternal great grandmother did the same and (gasp) even had children to said non-husband.

However, I quickly realised she had a very strong picture of her roots, and in shattering her illusions about them I was also shattering a piece of her.  "Who Do You Think You Are" is a very apt title, because my mother really did think she knew who she was & who she came from, and hearing anything different - especially something she viewed as 'bad' - turned a lot of things upside down for her and it really wasn't fair for me to do that, so I stopped. 

My dad is different though - all but one grandparent died before he was born, and as he knows virtually nothing of his family history he has nothing invested in it.  The only downside is he has absolutely no idea who I'm talking about when I try to tell him about my 'finds' so isn't really interested either way 

[dowdstree]

Hi,

Not found out anything really "criminal" yet about my ancestors oh a few "marriages" that appear never to have been legalised and a bit of poaching.

I remember my dad and his brother having a conversation once that went like this-
Uncle - I've done something you never did Sandy
Dad   -  What was that Willie?
Uncle - I Was at mum and dad's wedding
Dad   - You're drunk Willie
Uncle - Have you ever seen their marriage certificate Sandy?
Dad   - No

Turns out that Willie was correct - he was born 3 month after the wedding.

I know that my granddad did a bit of poaching in Invergowrie Bay (near Dundee) and went shooting in the Sidlaw Hills in Angus.

Also, didn't come home from the pub one night - caught drinking after hours (called a lock in in Scotland) and ended up spending the night in the police cells and was fined by the court next day.
My gran was mortified
Also some who ended up in the Workhouse. Two were young children whose mother died and father did a runner.
Seriously though all my ancestors appear to have been poor hard working folks who worked long hours for rubbish wages. Probably did a bit of "shop lifting" at times to feed their numerous children (hope they didn't get caught) no record of that. - yet

But do you know what I am proud of them all.

Dorrie
 

[jaybelnz]

I uncovered a skeleton a few years ago and when I shared the info it has been met with disdain.

Facts and knowledge re our families are what makes our pursuit so interesting and truly human! Head in the sand I bit I think, and maybe the kind of people that only want to find Royalty or  Wealth! And lots of names and dates!  Not the way for me either!  Luv em all, and I want to know about the people, their lives and times, everything I can find, there's good and bad in every family I'm sure, including mine!  No-one is perfect!

If You Could See Your Ancestors
By Nellie Winslow Simmons Randall

If you could see your ancestors
All standing in a row,
Would you be proud of them or not?
Or don't you really know?
Some strange discoveries are made
In climbing family trees.
And some of them, you know,
Do not particularly please.

If you could see your ancestors
All standing in a row,
There might be some of them perhaps
You shouldn't care to know.
But here's another question
Which requires a different view -
If you could meet your ancestors
Would they be proud of you?

Jeanne