Ancestry matches don't reply to me....

[michelles5257]

My brother and I have had a unique situation with matched cousins not responding to messages.  On 23andMe and Ancestry, we have both contacted cousin matches who stated on their profiles that their grandparents were from the same town as our maternal grandfather.  We wrote to several people and initially got enthusiastic responses.  When we would write back to them and provide our grandfather's name and date of birth, they all "disappeared"! LOL.  If it happened once, we would say it's a coincidence.  But it happened to both my brother and me several times.  Very strange that as soon as our grandfather's name is mentioned, they don't respond.  So now, of course, we're even more curious wondering if our grandfather did something that upset his family.  He was born in the Philippines in 1895 and passed away in 1955. 

[Daonnachd]

To be honest, I was very sceptical about using DNA to trace family connections, but one day I saw an offer and thought I'd give it a try anyway. I only really hoped to find out if I had any blood lines outside UK & Europe.

Like many of you I've been sent links, but the trees themselves seemed poorly managed or the person didn't reply.

However, I have had 2 results that have delighted and surprised me. The first one was from someone who told me which line I was related to him by, which gave me the clue I needed to find my Great Grandfather's family. He had been a brick wall for years, but it turns out he'd changed his surname, however all the other information about him matched exactly what I already had.

Also, a second cousin in the US contacted me. We had met as teenagers, but as it was our mothers who kept in touch, when they died we lost contact. We have since kept in touch, and have so much in common we plan to meet up one day. 

So I guess the message is don't give up on it. Someone might contact you in time who is worth following up.

[michelles5257]

Thank you so much for sharing your story! I won't give up hope! 😊

[brigidmac]

Top match for my 3rd  cousin came out as 1st cousin & the tree was managed by his son who also managed 2 people from the next generation ( his daughters ) the top match cannot use computers and son was busy and lives aboard .corresponded once .

On their tree the mother is listed as Gertrude JONES but that is her maiden name .it took a long time to sort out exact relationship ,+ who they were in the tree

[LizzieL]

Every time I check on Ancestry for new matches, I also now check for new messages, because I definitely am not getting email notifications from Ancestry for every new message. I get some notifications but not all of them and there doesn't seem to be a common factor in what are missed.
Maybe that's a general problem with the Ancestry messaging system.

[IgorStrav]

Having not had much success with DNA matches - ie not being able to find out exactly where the shared ancestor is, given that many people do not have detailed trees  - I now focus on progressing my own tree by widening it as much as possible via my known ancestors' siblings and their families.

And if any of these people appear on other trees, as shown within HINTS, I click on the tree owner's name to see if there is a DNA link.  I've had limited success with this, but at least it seems a sensible way of progressing.....

And yes, before you say it, I do appreciate that HINTS is only as good as you can document the claims.

[LizzieL]

My brother and I have had a unique situation with matched cousins not responding to messages.  On 23andMe and Ancestry, we have both contacted cousin matches who stated on their profiles that their grandparents were from the same town as our maternal grandfather.  We wrote to several people and initially got enthusiastic responses.  When we would write back to them and provide our grandfather's name and date of birth, they all "disappeared"! LOL.  If it happened once, we would say it's a coincidence.  But it happened to both my brother and me several times.  Very strange that as soon as our grandfather's name is mentioned, they don't respond.  So now, of course, we're even more curious wondering if our grandfather did something that upset his family.  He was born in the Philippines in 1895 and passed away in 1955.

Welcome to Rootschat.
You do seem to have odd situation there. Have you checked newspapers to see if there was any situation between family members which might have been reported.
I had a great uncle who stole from his family and there was a newspaper report, but they didn't want to press charges.

[Glen in Tinsel Kni]

Ancestry are far from the market leader when it comes to DNA usability and site features beyond having the biggest database and possibly parent assignment (though that desperately needs updating to include new results on a regular basis. Quantity does not equal quality.

Only four of my top 50 matches have trees and are marked as being active in the last 12 months. Each has been messaged, one has replied, two have read messages and failed to reply, one hasn't read the message at all. I can group some of those 50 together but there is no real benefit to knowing that. The fact I can now message groups and be ignored en masse rather than just on a one to one basis is not a 'feature' but Ancestry gave their marketing dept the task of making it sound like the answer to all things 'collaborative'.

[michelles5257]

My brother and I have had a uniq

ue situation with matched cousins not responding to messages.  On 23andMe and Ancestry, we have both contacted cousin matches who stated on their profiles that their grandparents were from the same town as our maternal grandfather.  We wrote to several people and initially got enthusiastic responses.  When we would write back to them and provide our grandfather's name and date of birth, they all "disappeared"! LOL.  If it happened once, we would say it's a coincidence.  But it happened to both my brother and me several times.  Very strange that as soon as our grandfather's name is mentioned, they don't respond.  So now, of course, we're even more curious wondering if our grandfather did something that upset his family.  He was born in the Philippines in 1895 and passed away in 1955.

Welcome to Rootschat.
You do seem to have odd situation there. Have you checked newspapers to see if there was any situation between family members which might have been reported.
I had a great uncle who stole from his family and there was a newspaper report, but they didn't want to press charges.

Hi Lizzie,

Thank you for your reply! Unfortunately, my grandfather was born in the Philippines in 1895, so I don't have any access to newspaper reports.  It is truly a mystery.  I wish just one cousin match would tell me what their family told them about my grandfather, instead of "disappearing" the minute they read his name! LOL