Telling people about errors in their tree?

[Mart 'n' Al]

It is weird. Yesterday I contacted somebody who replied to me this morning. I inadvertently got the year of my great grandmother's birth wrong by a year, from memory. I'd want anyone to point out something like that to me. If I'd missed an apostrophe or a capital letter I want somebody to tell me. And certainly if I had something structurally and genealogical wrong I'd certainly want to know about it.

Martin

[pharmaT]

I have vowed to never contact anyone to tell them their tree is wrong. 

I had a terrible experience when someone contacted me to tell me I had my Dad's death wrong on my tree. When I replied giving evidence I had I had a terribly rude answer basically saying I was delusional.

If someone specifically asks me if something is accurate I try and answer truthfully but I do feel panicky.

[BW252]

I would be delighted if someone pointed out errors on my tree.    I try not to put anything on my tree unless I have verified it, usually with the excellent help from Rootschatters if I am stuck.

It must be really frustrating when someone tries to help another by pointing out a glaring mistake only to get rude answers.    However be assured that there are many of us who are extremely grateful for all help given.

Harry

[andrewalston]

I always check that they have been logged in recently before contacting anyone.

It's surprising how many contacts go into "denial mode" when you try to help someone along, which I usually do by providing information which they may not have had access to. I think this is the most tactful approach, trying to avoid the "you are wrong".

One contact a couple of months ago had their great grandmother, who married in Leicester to a Leicester family, being born in Coventry rather than Leicester. She had quite a common first and last name, but had Emma as a middle one. The groom had an unusual first name and a VERY unusual surname.

When I passed on the bride's proper parentage, and where to find the same details I had come up with, they insisted upon a Coventry birth. Yes there was a girl born there, but the registration has no middle name, while the Leicester one has Emma to match every other record of the woman.

I provided a transcription of the 1912 marriage entry from FindMyPast, told them where they could see the image, and mentioned that the bride's address matched the 1911 census entry, and her father matched my research rather than anything in Coventry.

They have decided that there must have been a second man with the exact same unusual names as their great grandfather, living in 1912 in the same road as where their ancestor lived in 1911, and with a matching age, trade and father's details. They have simply removed the 1912 marriage from their tree, presumably in the hope of tracking down a second marriage which the GRO have never heard of.

Well, I tried to help a 4th cousin, but there's no point in flogging a dead horse...   

[pinefamily]

And Andrew, sometimes "Aunt Bessie " might just be more right. 

This point can always pose a dilemma: details which have been handed down several generations can suffer from Chinese Whispers - I am fairly sure of two on my own tree which old newspapers have explained - while original records, although not corrupted by time, will only show what was stated (and heard) at the time.  That could be wrong for all sorts of reasons, as has been discussed before.

Perhaps the most reliable source may be a family 'bible' which should have been compiled by someone in the know without an axe to grind.   Sadly I think that habit may have largely died out.

I understand your point about stories being handed down over the generations, but in my case I actually spoke to the generation involved (my great aunt). Interestingly my grandmother and her next two sisters all took the surname of the Swedish man, as did their younger sisters. Yet the older girls went by the surname of the first husband.
As for family bibles, they too can be doctored, if the author has a reason to amend the truth. A family bible imy family has anamended birthdate for the oldest girl, to hide the fact she was born a month after her parents' wedding. In that case, the original record was correct.

[Andy_T]

I don't post my full direct tree online for security reasons but I do share it with many family members.
I have posted short extracts of my tree online and I don't mind at all if a member of my family or someone else gives feedback for some correction needed.

If they are correct, I will change the wrong details and thank the person bringing it to my attention.

Andy_T

[Kaylenebruce]

I love it when people point out a mistake, gives a whole new line to chase.

However I have been on the recieving end a third cousin merged with one of my trees, locked me out of it then had the gall to  remove my father, splitting the tree , had my mother living in Australia (she never left New Zealand) and told me off for not answering her questions on that site, I can't actually get into it. She did post publicly that my family was "rude and stupid", well we will be in future to her if she ever answers my emails.

Oh  and if she reads this, phfffttttttt.

Never mind I have mind some fabulous people, and welcome their pointing out my mistakes. When I see a difference between my tree and someone else's I ask if they would mind comparing notes. If they don't reply I accept they may have a third cousin like mine or have moved on.

Kaylene

[Ayashi]

I was excited to find someone the other week related to someone in my tree I really wanted to find descendants from. The information was a bit iffy but I messaged him with a cheerful message along the lines of "I haven't found that child before, I must have missed him, how did you find him?" and then, looking at the rest of his tree, I later (after his own cheerful reply...) had to tactfully point out that I don't think his great-grandmother had her children in her 70s.

(I did supply a couple of candidates for him to look into though...)

[ms_canuck]

I'm one who welcomes someone letting me know I'm wrong on my tree.  It's happened a couple of times, and each time I worked with the other person to make sure I got it right.  Once it was simply removing an incorrect child, and another was removing a middle name and an incorrect census.

The only time I've gone to someone to tell them something in their tree was wrong, was when I politely corrected an American who was putting "England" after Welsh place names, e.g. Coedpoeth, Wrexham, Wales, England....    I could imagine my poor grandmother spinning in her Welsh grave over that one!

Ms_C