When to update online tree

[iolaus]

Just wondering is there any etiquette or thoughts on when to update an online tree with a death?

If it was just on my own records I would likely do it straight away (or at least the first time I had it out afterwards, but since I've started getting into geneology the only deaths in my family up to now have been elderly (ish - my aunt at 70 would have disputed it) and expected due to long term terminal illness.  But the main tree I work on is on ancestry - living people are hidden, but not those who have passed away

I'm not sure if I'm not wanting to update my cousin's record because I don't want to accept his death or if I'm just overthinking things

Any thoughts?

[Manchester Rambler]

Family history is more than just names and dates, so if you're not ready to publish your cousin's death  (or feel that the family isn't ready for it), then my own view is that it can wait - online trees range from those which are updated immediately when new info is found to those which are uploaded once and never updated at all!

Although I use offline software for the main version of my tree, I found that in the short term I was unable do more than just record basic details for the death of close family members - there was a lapse of several months (at least!) before I was ready to add biographical info, anecdotes, memories, etc. Others might find comfort in doing this immediately, but my point is we're all different and there's no "right" answer.

Rambler

[Maiden Stone]

I agree with Manchester Rambler.

[garstonite]

Yes - without doubt - in your own time when you are comfortable with it ..

[Pheno]

No right or wrong I don't think.  It took me some time to include my mother's death in 2018 on my ancestry tree even though I had dealt with all probate issues and the sale of the property within the immediately following months that felt like administration and what had to be done.  Actually including the details on my ancestral records felt very different so I just waited until I was more comfortable with doing that.

Pheno

[Crumblie]

I would agree that there is no wrong or right time, just do it when you feel it is right. Having said that I would say that if it is a public tree you might want to consider relatives you may have lost touch with who may see your tree.

[Maiden Stone]

I'm like Pheno. It's as if one is consigning the person to history while still processing the emotional impact of the death and confronting one's own mortality.
I also agree with Crumblie.