DNA ethnicity logic check / Unexpected result

[Guy Etchells]

I've absolutely no intention of cutting my dad out in any way - he's my dad. I'm surprised that's even entertained as an idea! I can't imagine many people in this position do that, but maybe I'm wrong.

I only mentioned that as clarification to my "forget about him as your biological father" point, he is still your "dad".

Only one sister is aware of the situation. She was the one who we thought was a full sibling, and she is no longer interested in doing a DNA test in any circumstances. My other sister was a half sibling, but I see no reason to involve her as she has a different father so it would be a moot point anyway. Both are younger.

I haven't seen any of my cousins in decades. But, again, I'm not sure what benefit getting all of them tested would be in looking for my own father?

They won't help in tracing your father but they may provide more of the DNA of your female (mother's) lineage, depending on what side of the family they come from. That can help in distinguishing what DNA may come from your father's side of the family.

I strongly suspect this DNA test is going to confirm that we're not biologically related, but I am honestly not sure what to think. A few people who I have spoken to working in this area seem to think that 'mass market' tests are inaccurate, mixed up, or misinterpreted frequently enough that they think it's always worth getting a second opinion. Which is worrying, I guess... but there you have it.

That depends on what they are referring to, whether it is the DNA results or the ethnicity results. Ethnicity is a construct that changes. Whereas your DNA is fixed in every cell of your body and does not change unless you have other DNA added by various routes, e.g. bone marrow transplant, blood transfusion etc.
Having said that your sample may be contaminated by mishandling.

Cheers
Guy

[AndyH81]

That depends on what they are referring to, whether it is the DNA results or the ethnicity results. Ethnicity is a construct that changes. Whereas your DNA is fixed in every cell of your body and does not change unless you have other DNA added by various routes, e.g. bone marrow transplant, blood transfusion etc.
Having said that your sample may be contaminated by mishandling.

They weren't referring to ethnicity, but the results themselves as the result of mix ups, cross-contamination, or misinterpretation of the results (not sure what that meant, but I would assume the type of relationships - cousins for siblings and so on). All they really said was they'd had to contradict multiple results in the past. I kind of got the impression that they looked down on the genealogy site tests and were dubious about any results given. *shrug*

I don't know what the statistics are on cross-contaminations and mix-ups etc. are, although I'd like to think it was quite rare.

Either way, I can't imagine mine is wrong given that I've matched with a multitude of people who would be on my mother's side. That being said, I did also match a few more distant relatives who would be on my father's side who have no apparent connection to my maternal family in so far as I can tell. So god knows. This hurts my brain.

But as this final test is deemed good enough for the courts, I am accepting it as the definitive outcome, no matter what it says! 

[AndyH81]

Well, as expected: My father and I are definitely not related biologically.

And now I have no idea what to do, because it would seem that I share a common ancestor with my closest match, but I've no idea who... and she also has no idea who her father is.

Oh, what a mess!

[Nanna52]

Welcome to my world Andy, although it is an unknown grandfather I am chasing, not father and, more importantly, I knew about it.  After three years I have traced the line, confirmed my great grandparents but don’t know which of their five sons alive at the time did the deed.  If nothing else with this hobby I’ve learnt to be patient.  Take a deep breath, and your time before trying to delve further.  I was lucky I found someone who gave me the names of my great grandparents early on, but most don’t reply or question my research or say must be my fathers side that I know nothing about. 

[Rosinish]

Well, as expected: My father and I are definitely not related biologically.

And now I have no idea what to do, because it would seem that I share a common ancestor with my closest match, but I've no idea who... and she also has no idea who her father is.

Oh, what a mess!

I feel so heart sorry for you, although it seemed obvious this would be the likely outcome, knowing now for sure must be quite hurting all round & difficult to take in, regardless how prepared you thought you were?

I'd have been a total wreck if my DNA had shown my 'dad' was not my biological father.

I hope you're able to cope with the knowledge & it has no long lasting effects & wish you good luck in finding who/where you originate from.

Annie

[Ruskie]

Andy, I wonder if any of the rootschatters who offered to help you previously will still be willing to have a look at your results and see if they can make a connection between yourself and you highest (as well as other) matches? This would require you to supply personal details and give access to your dna kit, so of course that will be something you need to be comfortable with.

It might just be a matter of you waiting for that missing link to match with you. There is hope, especially with all those dna tests being given as Christmas gifts, and results filtering through.

I wish you the best of luck in your search, and don’t hesitate to ask for help or support if you need it.

[Michee]

I think my father is a bit embarrassed by the whole thing - he doesn't seem to want anyone else to know.

Perfectly understandable; "a bit embarrassed" may be an understatement. If I were in his shoes, I wouldn't want anyone outside the immediate family knowing.

Well, it's hardly his fault if my mother cheated. It's certainly tainted my opinion of her - but if it is confirmed he isn't my bio-father (which I am almost certain he won't be at this point) - I suppose I can't be too angry at her because I'd be wishing myself away.

I think he probably just doesn't want a big fuss over the whole thing. I've not told anyone yet anyhow, save for a few friends, and only one of my sisters knows. Not because I don't want people to know... but just because it doesn't make a huge amount of difference to our relationship.

I'd like to know how the culprit is, as it were, but not so we can have a relationship - I just want to complete as many of the pieces of the puzzle as I can.

I suppose both of us are also a little concerned of tainting everyone else's view of her too; her siblings, and nieces and nephews etc.

Andy, sometimes there are other reasons why a teenager  would find herself pregnant, and through no fault of her own, And Unable to tell anyone what happened.

 also could the date between your conception and her marriage mean she could have been pregnant before the marriage it doesn't always mean your mother cheated on your father. Other things in Life happen. Wish you the best with your search.

[Mowsehowse]

ANDY: I am so sorry that you are having difficulty getting your head around the test results confirming your suspicions. I would suggest your father must be a really wonderful person to have stayed with your mother, and raised you.  I imagine that during the war years many people did all sorts of things they may have lived to regret. I can't even begin to think myself into those circumstances.
      May I clarify on this point from GUY....
QUOTE "That depends on what they are referring to, whether it is the DNA results or the ethnicity results. Ethnicity is a construct that changes. Whereas your DNA is fixed in every cell of your body and does not change unless you have other DNA added by various routes, e.g. bone marrow transplant, blood transfusion etc.......   Cheers  Guy"
I was a committed blood donor for 50 years..... Is it possible I could be handed up to 100 "DNA matches" that have zero ancestral connection, but who have been recipients of my blood donations??


 

[Michee]

ANDY: I am so sorry that you are having difficulty getting your head around the test results confirming your suspicions. I would suggest your father must be a really wonderful person to have stayed with your mother, and raised you.  I imagine that during the war years many people did all sorts of things they may have lived to regret. I can't even begin to think myself into those circumstances.
      May I clarify on this point from GUY....
QUOTE "That depends on what they are referring to, whether it is the DNA results or the ethnicity results. Ethnicity is a construct that changes. Whereas your DNA is fixed in every cell of your body and does not change unless you have other DNA added by various routes, e.g. bone marrow transplant, blood transfusion etc.......   Cheers  Guy"
I was a committed blood donor for 50 years..... Is it possible I could be handed up to 100 "DNA matches" that have zero ancestral connection, but who have been recipients of my blood donations??

don't worry red blood cells and platelets which are what is used in transfusions don't contain a nucleus, only  the white cells do. The donor blood is spun on a centrifuge before use to seperate white cells from red. Your donation of blood will not permenantly alter a person's own DNA 🙂