However I find myself doing the very thing that I criticise my forebears for doing. That is I have not told my children about some important things which have happened to me and other family members.
Anyone else in the same situation?
Yes, I think about things in the middle of the night, think , “I must write that down”. I never do. And some things I could tell them I have made a conscious decision not to, and that is in today’s climate. So I don’t think it is at all surprising things were not told. Some of it is also to do with the time of death of one’s parents/grandparents too. The older they get, the more likely they are to reminisce. If they died young there was no opportunity for them to tell the stories.
Some things people would rather forget so never talk about.
Then of course there are the disparities in memories. My brothers and I will tell a completely different version of an event in my family. (I am the one who is right 
).
I completely agree with this. People have always been judgemental and are just as much or even more so these days. As a result I think there is likely to be much more left unsaid. I recently discovered that a distant relative inherited some slaves as payment of a debt - I probably need to be careful who I tell that to - don’t want to be shamed or guilt tripped.
On the other hand, things like shotgun weddings and children born out of wedlock which were once frowned upon, are now the norm, so those sorts of stories from the past are accepted by many/most.
I think Pharma warning her daughter there may be things she might not like in the family history is the sensible way to approach this.
