Janet MAIR Southampton - COMPLETED

[johking]

Hi everyone

I'm on an exciting trail here (well, exciting for me anyway...) We have family letters mentioning a Cousin Janet and we have been trying to find out how she is related to my ggg grandfather. Thanks to this forum I have found her in Southampton in the 1851 and 1861 census with husband Matthew Mair, a draper and tea dealer.

The next hurdle was to find which side of the family she was on - and thanks to her husband's name from the census I have found a marriage in the IGI.

So, from census and marriage I know she is Janet CLEMENT, born approximately 1815 in Scotland, married Matthew MAIR 17 May 1848 in Deptford.

Now, the puzzle was that I knew all the possible fathers for Janet (4 possibilities among the brothers back in Kirkcudbrightshire) and none seemed to have a Janet of the right age. However - wonderful find - I have finally got a lead... the grave of one of the brothers Robert CLEMENT in Balmaclellan, Kirkcudbrightshire, which mentions:
"Janet his daughter who died 5th December 1863 aged 48 years"
Counting back, that makes her born in 1815 (which would be just right for the Southampton Janet. It would also explain why she disappears from the census after 1861). I know that Robert married his wife in 1819, so this daughter must have been illegitimate and probably by another woman. I cannot find a birth record.

However, there is no proof that the Janet on the grave is the same Janet from Southampton. I have looked through all the Scottish records and can't find a Janet Clement or Mair death for that time. Registration of deaths in Scotland was compulsory after 1855, therefore I can only assume that the Janet mentioned on the stone is not buried in that graveyard nor anywhere in Scotland - but just mentioned by her sorrowing father (his wife had died by that time, by the way). Obviously, I am hoping that she really is my Southampton Janet and that she must be buried in Southampton. So my questions are:

Are there resources to be able to look up memorial inscriptions in Southampton for 1863? I imagine there must be a lot of graveyards so is this a needle-in-the-haystack request? The parish in 1861 is noted as Southampton St Mary - does that help? Also, if there is a Scottish church at all they may well have gone to that.

I would be grateful for any advice. Also if anyone can spot flaws in my reasoning or other avenues to pursue

Many thanks

Jo

[johking]

I'm replying to myself here

Just thought to check Ancestry BMDs and there is a Janet Mair who died in Southampton in the last quarter of 1863!

What do you think? Is it sounding pretty cast-iron?

My previous questions with regard to memorial inscriptions still hold though, if anyone has suggestions.

Jo

[Little Nell]

Hi Jo,

The death of a Janet Mair was indeed registered in Southampton RD Dec qtr 1863 2c 17.  Only one way to find out........

Did the MI say "In memory of...."  - in which case she may not be buried there.  It's an awful long way back to Kirkcudbright and would have been very expensive for the average person at that time.

I can't find any evidence of a Scottish Church in Southampton.

Nell

[johking]

Thanks for the reply, Nell.

The first part of the MI says "Erected by Robert Clement in memory of... and then his wife's name and 2 daughters. For his wife and the other daughter he says what place they died, but not for Janet. I wouldn't be surprised if none of the 3 are buried there as Robert returned to his birthplace in his later years and that is where the gravestone is and where he himself is buried (6 years after Janet's death). It would be interesting to see the actual stone and whether it is obvious when the different inscriptions were done.  I wonder if he got the first 3 done after he moved back to Balmaclellan and well after the actual deaths.

I am sure there will be a MI somewhere in Southampton (though probably not in a 'Scotch church') as Matthew MAIR was fairly prosperous - certainly in the 1861 census he is a "draper and tea dealer, master employing 2 men". It won't necessarily tell me a great deal - but it would be nice to see. Are there books of Memorial Inscriptions somewhere?

I know that I will have to get the death certificate now to be absolutely sure that this is Robert's daughter and to find the mother's name, but how do I actually go about that in England? I can't see how I can do it through ancestry.co.uk - do I have to get in touch with the GRO in London? Or is it possible/cheaper to visit myself if I have several bits of information to find? Any tips gratefully received.

Jo

[Little Nell]

Jo,

An English death certificate does not show the parents' names.  Your only confirmation would be from the date of death.  It would show you if she were Matthew Mair's wife though.

There may be MIs for Southampton - but I'm not sure of the dates.  I suggest that you contact the the Southampton City Archives, they may be able to point you in the direction of the Burial Registers.

http://www.southampton.gov.uk/leisure/archives/default.asp#0http://www.southampton.gov.uk/leisure/archives/default.asp#0

You can order the death certificate online from the GRO using the reference that you already have:

http://www.gro.gov.uk/gro/content/certificate/index.asp#0

If you have a number of things to find, then it may be better to visit Southampton in person - and an awful lot more fun!

Nell

[johking]

Hi Nell

Well thanks very much for that information. It would have been a huge disappointment if I had ordered the certificate thinking I would get parents' names as in Scotland.

I'm definitely going down the MI route in that case and thanks for the link. I'll let you know how I get on.

All the best

Jo

[johking]

Just to say thanks again Nell for that link to the Southampton Archives. I got a great reply today and I now know where Janet and her husband Matthew are buried - in the Old Cemetery on the Common in Southampton. The archivist Sue Hill also gave me the MI transcription and had tried to find them in the lists of communicants at the St Andrews Presbyterian Church which was attended by a large congregation of Scots.

A quite excellent service... As I wrote to Sue - you send off these queries more in hope than expectation and this reply was far far more than I expected. Hooray!

Jo

[johking]

And - most importantly - it does answer my original query in that the death date is exactly the same as the one on the gravestone in Kirkcudbrightshire. Given the unlikelihood of 2 Janet Clements being born into that extended family dying on exactly the same day, I think I have found the father of "Cousin Janet" at last. All thanks to this excellent forum of course

Jo

[Little Nell]

That is what I call a result! 

Well done Southampton Archives.

Nell