A couple aspects which may not be popular but here goes...
"But I know they are dead" - with reference to someone who died recently...
We generally quarantine and or edit these posts to NOT name the recently deceased. This is a real story...
I was sitting in a bar at lunchtime in Uni and my friend was reading the paper. She turned the page and went white, like all the blood had drained from her. We asked her what it was. It was an obituary for her father. She didn't know he was dead.
This is an extreme story but when you have witnessed a person read about the death of a loved one it's hard to forget and not think I hope that never happens to me.
So on one level we think about the next generation. If you give detail about a deceased uncle are his children wanting to read about his death on a public forum?
On a technical point security questions in the financial services often rest on mother's maiden name - deceased or not. If somebody has innocently posted info about their mother they leave themselves and their siblings exposed.
If a user asks "Does anyone know John Smith born 1950 London went to St Francis primary school his mum is Jane Jones" they have given away 4 maybe 5 of the security script questions.
Our policy and my judgment in moderating is based on whether we could gain info we shouldn't have, if the answer is yes then quarantine it is.
We don't delete unless we can't see a way of editing.
It is worth noting that this is not a point of law but a judgment on protecting our users and other people.
Anyway, finally, it is possible to ask HOW to do something without giving specific detail of the person we are doing it about.
Sometimes we get so used to dealing with "our people" we forget they are other people's people to. In the last year I have had to delete posts on this site where a family member who would of been an old chap if alive had been declared illegitimate, another who had been outed. These are people who have a right to their privacy.
I'm happy to answer any questions anyone might have on this subject, by PM if preferred if you are unsure if a piece of info would be considered to revealing.
All the best,
Pam
