Hi Treegirl
Well, what a tangled web this is. First off, I cannot find a marriage between this couple anywhere - even checked Army marriages.
Have found Henry with his family in 1861 and 1871 though it was hard to find them. In 1861 - transcribed as Hamming - at Christian Malford - ref. RG9 - 1285 - 78 - 12. In 1871 - transcribed as Hannums - at Christian Malford - ref. RG10 - 1900 - 80 - 11.
Have looked on 2 different sites for 1881 and I don't think they are mistranscribed - I think they just managed to elude the enumerator somehow. Have even done searches just on christian names and still they don't come up.
Now to Annie Marie Wilde.
Think I have found her - birth registered at Medway in Mar. 1855 as -
Anne Maria Wild. She was with family in Gillingham, Kent - town of New Brompton - in 1861. No time to note all details but they are easy to find. In 1871 mother and siblings still in Gillingham - daughter in question is working as a servant in St. Botolph, Colchester, Essex as Anna Maria Wild.
I looked at the Army marriages because Medway district and Colchester are both army areas and I wondered if maybe that's how she met Henry.
Chatham, Gillingham, New Brompton are all part of the Medway district.
So, looks like both can now be traced although alas not their marriage nor 1881 census appearance.
Best wishes
Annette