Author Topic: Gentlemen Only Funerals in Wales - Why?  (Read 969 times)

Offline Wexflyer

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Gentlemen Only Funerals in Wales - Why?
« on: Thursday 02 May 24 09:51 BST (UK) »
Here is an example, but I have seen many others.
BRENNANx2 Davidstown/Taghmon,Ballybrennan; COOPER St.Helens;CREAN Raheennaskeagh/Ballywalter;COSGRAVE Castlebridge?;CULLEN Lady's Island;CULLETON Forth Commons;CURRAN Hillbrook, Wic;DOYLE Clonee/Tombrack;FOX Knockbrandon; FURLONG Moortown;HAYESx2 Walsheslough/Wex;McGILL Litter;MORRIS Forth Commons;PIERCE Ladys Island;POTTS Bennettstown;REDMOND Gerry; ROCHEx2 Wex; ROCHFORD Ballysampson/Ballyhit;SHERIDAN Moneydurtlow; SINNOTT Wex;SMYTH Gerry/Oulart;WALSH Kilrane/Wex; WHITE Tagoat area

Online Cas (stallc)

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Re: Gentlemen Only Funerals in Wales - Why?
« Reply #1 on: Thursday 02 May 24 10:37 BST (UK) »
It was a custom that some older folks still hold today.

Women & men would attend the funeral service at home, or at chapel, but only the men would go graveside. Normally the women would prepare the wake.

Not many adere to the tradition today.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/waleshistory/2010/10/a_good_welsh_funeral.html

Cas
Census information is Crown Copyright www.nationalarchives.gov.uk

Squire/Thomas/Davies/Gibbons/Mordecai/Bowen/Lewis/Rees/Williams/Jones/Llewellyn/Morgan - Glamorgan
Lewis - Breckonshire
Davies/Roderick - Myddfai Carms
Lloyd/Jones - Denbigh/Salop
Thackwell/Thomas - Hereford/Monmouthshire
Shoemac/Squire/Keirle/Small - Somerset
Berry/Baggot/Lee/Clayton - Lancs
Yelland/Bray/Trethewey - Cornwall
Baggot/Hurley/Keaveny/Shiel/Flynn - Ireland

Offline CaroleW

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Re: Gentlemen Only Funerals in Wales - Why?
« Reply #2 on: Thursday 02 May 24 11:22 BST (UK) »
My friends father died in 1976 & it was a "men only" funeral.  There didn't seem to be any particular reason as he wasn't a member of any society etc. 

I remember finding it rather odd that his widow & only child stayed at home with other female relatives
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Carlin (Ireland & Liverpool) Doughty & Wright (Liverpool) Dick & Park (Scotland & Liverpool)

Offline GR2

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Re: Gentlemen Only Funerals in Wales - Why?
« Reply #3 on: Thursday 02 May 24 11:22 BST (UK) »
I have not come across that wording in a Scottish funeral notice, but it was also the custom here for men only to attend the actual burial. The first time women in my family followed the coffin to the graveyard was when my grandfather died in 1965.


Offline Gillg

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Re: Gentlemen Only Funerals in Wales - Why?
« Reply #4 on: Thursday 02 May 24 11:32 BST (UK) »
I experienced this on the Scottish island of Mull many years ago.  A funeral procession of men made its way through the town, winding its way up a hill to the church and graveyard. Many houses had curtains drawn at the windows.  I don't know at what point women were involved in the funeral, as we didn't follow the procession.  The island was very set in its ways then and women were not allowed in pubs at that time.  I expect things have changed a lot by now.

Things like this always make me wonder why men are so afraid (?) of women that they put so many limitations on their behaviour.  But that's another topic...
Census information is Crown Copyright, from www.nationalarchives.gov.uk

FAIREY/FAIRY/FAREY/FEARY, LAWSON, CHURCH, BENSON, HALSTEAD from Easton, Ellington, Eynesbury, Gt Catworth, Huntingdon, Spaldwick, Hunts;  Burnley, Lancs;  New Zealand, Australia & US.

HURST, BOLTON,  BUTTERWORTH, ADAMSON, WILD, MCIVOR from Milnrow, Newhey, Oldham & Rochdale, Lancs., Scotland.

Offline aghadowey

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Re: Gentlemen Only Funerals in Wales - Why?
« Reply #5 on: Thursday 02 May 24 12:34 BST (UK) »
When my mother-in-law died in 1990 the custom was to have the service at home then the men proceeded to the grave with the coffin. As soon as they left the women made themselves a cup of tea then prepared food which was served to the men when they returned. The food was either a complete sit down dinner or sandwiches, scones & buns served with tea.
It was a little while later that I remember hearing of women at the graveside (the two daughters of the dead woman)- it was quite uncommon.
Away sorting out DNA matches... I may be gone for some time many years!

Online AlanBoyd

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Re: Gentlemen Only Funerals in Wales - Why?
« Reply #6 on: Thursday 02 May 24 13:09 BST (UK) »
I searched BNA for "cemetery gentlemen only". The most recent hits are for 1999 and seem to correspond to four different funerals in that year, all in South Wales (the newspapers are the South Wales Echo and the South Wales Daily Post).
Boyd, Dove, Blakey, Burdon

Offline bridgwatergirl

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Re: Gentlemen Only Funerals in Wales - Why?
« Reply #7 on: Thursday 02 May 24 13:21 BST (UK) »
One branch of my Mum's family in Somerset had this tradition as well - no women at the graveside, to the point that I think even quite a late 20th C funeral observed (I remember my Mum being relieved at not having to go).  I'm not sure why, because I don't think it was a widespread thing there and they weren't the branch that originally came from Wales, either.
Somerset - YOUNG, GADD, WASHER, VENN, SULLY, PAIN, ROWSELL, PADDON, BEER, DIBBLE.  Devon - TURNER, TOMS, BERRY, SHAMBROOK, GRIBBLE.  London - JEWITT, HARGRAVE, NELMS, FORSTER, TAYLOR.  Glamorgan - EVANS, JOSEPH, THOMAS, GRIFFITHS, LEWIS.  Lincs - JEWITT, BARWICK, BROWN.  Kent - TAYLOR, GODDEN, MACE.

Online GrahamSimons

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Re: Gentlemen Only Funerals in Wales - Why?
« Reply #8 on: Thursday 02 May 24 14:52 BST (UK) »
Experienced this in 2005 in Scotland. Tradition.
Simons Barrett Jaffray Waugh Langdale Heugh Meade Garnsey Evans Vazie Mountcure Glascodine Parish Peard Smart Dobbie Sinclair....
in Stirlingshire, Roxburghshire; Bucks; Devon; Somerset; Northumberland; Carmarthenshire; Glamorgan