This is a long story, but I think it's relevant, so bear with me.
My father's parents divorced when he was a young boy and he never saw his mother again. Several years after they had both died, I was bitten by the genealogy bug and spent a lot of time, money and effort uncovering her origins.
My father's mother (M) was born in a Salvation Army Maternity Home. I learned that her mother (T) had left her father (J) while heavily pregnant with twins. (She ran off with a sweet-talking scoundrel, leaving her husband and a three-year-old daughter behind.)
My father's mother (M) was raised by a great-uncle and his wife in a different country (just over the border). Her mother (T) and father (J) never divorced but each eventually settled down with new common-law spouses and the children of those unions believed their parents to be married.
With the help of another (amateur) family researcher, I eventually made contact with one of J's grandsons; he was the son of J's son from his second "marriage." This grandson was happy to share some info with me, because he was curious. He reached out to his aunt (J's daughter) and she was okay with me phoning her once or twice. This aunt sent him some photos and he sent me copies of them, which was amazing.
However, the grandson's father (J's son; my deceased father's half-uncle) didn't want to talk to me. In fact, he didn't want to hear anything about it. This was before I figured out that T had actually walked out on J; at the time, we all assumed that J (the husband) had been the one who walked out on his pregnant wife (T), and J's son didn't want to hear anything that contradicted the extremely positive experiences he'd had with his father.
So, that's one reason why some people might not respond to queries.
This was before the advent of online DNA databases for genealogy purposes. The paper trail was sketchy. I was seeking proof that my father's mother (M) was the biological child of her mother's husband (J). I found documentation on the sketchy boyfriend that seemed to prove he wasn't my biological grandfather but I was really hoping for something solid.
Several years after making contact with J's grandson, I saw an online obit for the grandson's father (my deceased father's half-uncle). A photo was included with the obit and, in my opinion, there is a definite resemblance to my father; however, that isn't proof. Unfortunately for me, none of the descendants from J's second "marriage" seem to have done DNA testing, so I haven't been able to confirm it that way (the spelling of their surname is unique to that branch of the family, so it should be easy enough to find).
